Woman: Excuse me, where’s the restroom?
Usher guy: Sixth seat on the right, ma’am.
–Eugene O’Neill Theater, West 49th Street
Woman: Excuse me, where’s the restroom?
Usher guy: Sixth seat on the right, ma’am.
–Eugene O’Neill Theater, West 49th Street
Girl #1: I’m serious, I’m 23
Girl #2: No way you ain’t. I’m 23, and I’m 28,
–Olive Garden, Times Square
Hag: I can’t imagine dropping off my brother at the airport all like, “I’m okay with never seeing you again ’cause you might die in battle.”
Queer: Well, at least he gets a whore.
Hag: What?
Queer: ‘Cause you know they get whores in wars.
Hag: What are you talking about?
Queer: Hello? World War II?
–Olive Garden, Times Square
Dude #1: What’d that guy want?
Dude #2: White guy wanted to know where the Kangol hat store was.
Dude #1: Him?
Dude #2: Yeah, must be from Jersey.
–Times Square
Overheard by: chris b.
Old man: You are the most beautiful woman in the world.
Girl: Aw, thanks!
Guy: She has crabs!
–Times Square 1/2/3 station
Overheard by: Meaghan Stefaniak
Tourist lady #1: Is this it?
Tourist lady #2: I think this is it.
Tourist lady #1: You’d think they’d have signs or something.
Tourist lady #2: Yeah, this must be it, though.
–Times Square
Girl #1: What language are they singing in? Is that German?
Girl #2: No, it’s European.
–Virgin, Times Square
Man #1: Honey, we don’t have to see Memoirs of a Geisha. You lived it, didn’t you?
Woman: You just know the right things to say!
Man #2: Some people make me wish that snow outside was really acid.
–Loews 42nd Street
Hobo: Hey, can you spare me something?
Girl: Like what?
–Times Square
Overheard by: subwayrat
Guy: You should let her get a picture with the Naked Cowboy.
Dad: She’s only six! She’s not getting a picture with him.
Little girl: Daddy? I’m six?
–Times Square
