Girl: I sooo want oatmeal.
Guy: I have a George Foreman grill.
Girl: That doesn’t help me get oatmeal.
–1 train
Overheard by: Ethank
Girl: I sooo want oatmeal.
Guy: I have a George Foreman grill.
Girl: That doesn’t help me get oatmeal.
–1 train
Overheard by: Ethank
Asian chick: … And that’s the bar where I got roofied.
White chick: You didn’t get roofied! You got food poisoning!
Asian chick: Yeah, I know, but it doesn’t make for as good a story.
–W 4th & 6th
Hobo: [Mumbles.]20-something #1: What did he just say?
20-something #2: I think he was offering us grilled cheese.
–17th & 3rd
Tourist #1: Hmmm, I want to eat someplace funky…
Tourist #2: What about that? That looks funky.
Tourist #1: Mmm, no… Oh, look — Cosi! Sandwiches, wine, and dessert. Now that looks funky. Let’s go be crazy.
–50th & Broadway
Overheard by: CrazyMickey
Young boy, pointing at stack of apple danishes: Mom! Mom! I wanna eat a danish!
Mom: Stanley, you can’t eat cheese, and you can’t eat apples. You know this.
Young boy, exasperated: I know! But I can eat danish!
–Washington Ave & Eastern Pkwy, Brooklyn
Overheard by: xander
Black chick: What kind of soup do you got?
Chinese deli guy: Uhhh, we got some chicken noodle soup.
Black chick: Oh, just chicken noodle soup?
Chinese deli guy, singing and dancing: With a soda on the side! [Black chick glares at him in silence.] Uhhh, yeah, that’s all.
Black chick: That’s fuckin’ ign’ant, man.
–106th & 2nd
Lady: Maybe we should go get some soup for your daughter instead of the vegetable Tempura.
Mother of young girl: Why?
Lady: Because she’s not eating the vegetables — she’s just drinking the Tempura sauce.
Mother: Oh. That’s fine.
–Food court, Mall
Black guy #1: I just realized this is a long-ass ride! It’s like 15 minutes!
Black guy #2: Shut up, nigga.
Black guy #1: Is that your breath I smell? It smells like you ate roast beef with a side of shit… and grits.
–1 train
Overheard by: DC
Black guy: Aw, man, you’re missing out if you don’t eat that shit.
Indian guy: I used to eat a lot of shellfish in my heyday. Now I only eat fish… No more shrimp, crabs or lobster.
Black guy: I don’t know what’s up with lobster. That shit tastes like cardboard.
–Elevator, 132nd St
Overheard by: SlumpBuster
Girl #1: I don’t know what I want to eat. I’m trying to decide between sushi and cereal.
Girl #2: All I know is I want something hot. I don’t really care what. This is just one of those times when you want something warm in your mouth, whether it’s a cup of soup or a penis.
–2 train
