Promoting Sexy Racist Stereotypes: the Women

Hispanic girl: …yeah, I like that, it’s cool, but do they have it in a 16?
White girl: I think they only have 12s and 6s left.
Hispanic girl: Well, I’m not really a 16. It’s just this huge ass I have here. If you don’t count that, I’m a 12.

–Old Navy, Chelsea

Girl #1: I didn’t ask to be born.
Girl #2: Yeah, I didn’t ask our parents to be born into this cold, hard, cruel world.
Girl #1: Yeah!
Girl #2: On top of everything I had to be born black too, and a woman!
Girl #1: Yeah!
Girl #2: …but I was born light-skinned and have a big ass!

–Matsuri, Chelsea

Overheard by: Tamika J.

Posted on July 13, 2015
Ass, Beauty, Body Parts, Business and Commerce, Chelsea & the Meatpacking District, Family Ties, Fat People, Ghetto Chicks, Girls, Parents, Race

Thanks, Charles Atlas!

Ghetto girl #1: Girl! I ain’t seen you in forever!
Ghetto girl #2: Yeah! How ya been?
Ghetto girl #1 pointing to her ass: Look! Mmm!
Ghetto girl #2: Huh?
Ghetto girl #1: Last time you saw me I ain’t got no ass! Now… I got an ass!
Ghetto girl #2: Ohhh! Bye!

–35th & 8th

Overheard by: Dan

Posted on July 11, 2015
Ass, Ghetto Chicks, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen

10 Bucks on the Guy from Bed-Stuy

Black chick #1: I’ma see one of my boyfriends today.
Black chick #2: You got more than one?
Black chick #1: Hells yeah. One live in Bed-Stuy, the other live in Canarsie.
Black chick #2: That’s gangsta.

–Locker room, John Dewey High School, Brooklyn

Overheard by: Just trying to get dressed

Posted on July 6, 2015
Brooklyn, Ghetto Chicks, Relationships

What is Fatherhood, If Not Guns and Alcohol?

Flygirl #1: My brother was like mad drunk when his lady went into labor. He was gonna beat up these guys that were messing with our little brother, but he didn’t have his gun. He passed out but his friend got his ass to the hospital.
Flygirl #2: He gonna be such a good daddy.
Flygirl #1: Yeah.

–2 train

Posted on June 14, 2015
Babies, Ghetto Chicks, On the Subway, Violence

Darwin: “See?”

Ghetto-fabulous girl standing at crosswalk while cars whiz by: Why ain't we crossin'?
(friend points to cars)
Girl: Oh.

–Penn Station

Overheard by: erkala

Posted on June 11, 2015
Cars and Driving, Ghetto Chicks, Girls, Penn Station, Questions, Stupidity

I Also Need to Look into Becoming 2-Dimensional

Ghetto girl: You see Eva Longoria in this picture, and then you see her in this picture — she looks so different without her makeup!
Guy with wife: Yeah, airbrushing will do it every time.
Ghetto girl: Yeah, I need to get one of those airbrush machines.

–Lugo’s Mecca of Hair

Posted on June 9, 2015
Beauty, Ghetto Chicks, Store

2008: ‘Clone Your Own Aja’ Kits Go on Sale for 50 Dollars

Ghetto girl: Ladies and gentlemen, sorry to bother you. I am not selling these things to raise money for my school or a basketball team. I am selling them to raise money for me. I have a half-drunk bottle of Sprite, 25 cents.
Ghetto guy: That’s got your saliva in it.
Ghetto girl: I am gonna be famous some day — it will be worth a lot of money.

–C train

Overheard by: eej

Posted on June 7, 2015
Ghetto Chicks, Money & Class, On the Subway

Well, She's Not Really Sure After That Incident with the Donkey…

Ghetto girl #1: I went over there, and she's pregnant.
Ghetto girl #2, gasping: Pregnant with a *baby*?

–Q30 Bus

Overheard by: Cori

Headline by: missquirk

Runners-Up:
· “‘Cuz If It’s an Alien Again, I’m Skipping the Shower” – 1310 (formerly SNA)
· “Depends on Whether You Ask Pro-Lifers or Pro-Choicers” – Ryan
· “I Better Go Back and Check” – Mike
· “Judging by the Bleeding Statues and Pentagrams, No” – The Least Funny Demon
· “Never Take a Roofie at the Zoo” – Nick Pollotta
· “No, Just Shoplifting Again” – Skug Skellum
· “No………She Just Likes to Pause a Lot” – clair
· “Rosemary’s Friends Saw It Coming” – asdfghjkl;
· “She Was Drunk. The Dog *Looked* Like a Dude” – Jim
· “Someone’s Seen Alien a Few Too Many Times…” – Kei
· “Well It’s Either That or the Spawn Of Satan…” – J

Click here to see the new Headline Contest

Posted on June 6, 2015
Babies, Ghetto Chicks, Headline Contest Winners, On the Bus, Pregnancy & Birth Control, Questions, Stupidity

It's Wednesday One-Liners, Paleface!

Guy to friend: When Obama wins, I'm going to slap a white person.

–Central Park Bench

Overheard by: Lane

Lady getting sprayed with perfume by her friend: Stop. Stop it! You gonna make me smell like white people.

–East Drive, Prospect Park

Overheard by: White smelly jogger

Black gay man sans shirt, upon seeing group of white girls wandering: Oh my god, white girls! Oh, I didn't mean it like that.

–Christopher St

Gentleman walking past Miss Mamie's Spoonbread Too restaurant: Man, black people eating tofu, white people eating spoonbread…

–W 110th & Columbus

Gingy, referring to ebony colored condoms: This way, when I fuck a white boy he'll still be black!

–E Broadway 99 Cent Store

Black lady in african garb: Too many white flower! Need more black power! (the only white girl around looks up confusedly, now black lady screams in her face) White flower!

–125th & Adam Clayton Powell

Overheard by: Ruby

Posted on June 4, 2015
All Wednesday One-Liners, Anger Management, Bitch-slap, Black People, Brooklyn, Central Park, Compare/Contrast, Condoms, Food, Friends, Ghetto Chicks, Guys, Harlem & Morningside Heights, Lower East Side, Men, One-liners, Parks, President, Queer guys, Race, Sensory Experiences, Sex, Street, Weirdness, West Village, Women

Actually, It Was ‘Dipstick,’ and He Dropped It When He Got Famous

Ghetto guy: So what was his name?
Ghetto girl: Confucius.
Ghetto guy: No, what was his real name?
Ghetto girl: Confucius!
Ghetto guy: He didn’t have no last name?
Ghetto girl: No, he’s like Madonna; he don’t need no last name!

–Museum of Natural History

Overheard by: Joanna Kim

Posted on June 2, 2015
Ghetto Chicks, Museum of Natural History, Names

Ghetto Chicks