Entendre Queen, to 4-year-old daughter: Now you’ll have alone playtime for 40 minutes. Then Mommy will play with herself after that for another 40 minutes. Then Daddy will join Mommy for some playtime. You can either watch Mommy and Daddy play or go play on your own again.
–207th & Broadway
Overheard by: Elizabeth R.
College girl #1: So, like, if you know anyone who, like, needs, like, anyone to do, like, anything for money, I’m totally desperate.
College girl #2: Oh, for sure! I’ll totally let you know!
–St. Mark’s, between 2rd and 3nd
Guy #1: Wait a sec, what train is this? What am I on?
Guy #2: I’m on your mom. That’s what I’m on.
–D train
Man: The yogurt won’t fall. I’m straight.
Woman: You are straight!
Man: I am straight… now.
Woman: Thank god that’s over.
Man: Let’s get out of here before the whole thing collapses.
–Food Bazaar, Williamsburg
Guy: Yeah, that’s the first thing I learned when I moved here: don’t eat street meat, it’s probably pigeon or something.
Girl #1: Yeah, I wish I could get my husband to stop eating it.
Girl #2: I don’t care what kind of meat it is as long as it’s in my mouth.
Girl #1: That’s my sister; she’s looking for a hook-up.
Girl #2: No, I’m not!
Guy: I’m married.
–Irving Plaza, Irving Place
Overheard by: Johnny Tremain
