Man: You know my name. What is my name?
Little girl: Daddy.
Man: Then why are you hitting me in the face?
–M14 bus
Man: You know my name. What is my name?
Little girl: Daddy.
Man: Then why are you hitting me in the face?
–M14 bus
Hipster girl: I though she was like, moving to Africa or some shit to save the children or something.
Hipster boy: Well that didn’t happen. She moved to Williamsburg to save the trendy from hurting themselves with accessories.
–Happy Valley, East 27th Street
Guy: Hey look, it’s fucking Rudolph. You gonna gimme a ride, Rudolph? You faggot.
Little girl: Yeah, all reindeers are faggots. All reindeers are faggots, you faggot reindeer.
–46th & Broadway
Girl #1: I have to go soon, I have a child at home.
Girl #2: Oh, an undead abortion?
–Hi Fi, Avenue A
Teen girl: You know that dream I keep having where I kill you on Madison Avenue? I think it’s coming true.
Mom: Oh look, the Chanel store!
Teen girl: Uh oh.
–Madison between 63rd & 64th
Girl #1: What do you think of Brad Pitt adopting Angelina Jolie’s kids?
Girl #2: I don’t get it, she doesn’t want her kids anymore? She’s just going to give them to him?
Girl #1: Man, you’re an idiot.
–Coles Sports & Recreation Center, Mercer Street
Little boy: Hey mommy, I just farted on your leg.
Mom: I know. I felt it.
Little boy: Was it warm? Did it stink?
Mom: Shh.
–F train
Toddler boy: Mommy, how come those water towers don’t take off?
Mommy: What?
Toddler boy: How come those water towers don’t take off?
Mommy: You mean, water towers like on those buildings?
Toddler boy: Yeah.
Mommy: And take off, you mean like rockets?
Toddler boy: Yeah.
Mommy: What have you been reading?
–F train
Overheard by: Eric W
Dude #1: Hey, look at that guy.
Dude #2: What guy?
Dude #1: That guy, he just moved behind the thing. Is he staring at those kids?
Dude #3: Maybe he’s a kid aficionado.
–Downtown Brooklyn
Overheard by: brendon
Little boy: I ate a nail once.
Mom: I remember that. I think it came out in your diaper.
–41st & 9th
Overheard by: Cait O’Connor
