Native Americans

Chick: I can never understand how Native Americans stayed in such great shape, and still smoked as much as they did. 

–Fordham University

Overheard by: m‑co

Girl on cell: So I asked my doorman if I brought anyone home with me last night and he said he didn’t know! I told him it’s his job to know!

–Outside 145th subway station

Hipster girl: Santa is a man whore!

–45th & 8th

College girl: And then we’re having what I thought was a nice one night stand, and then, he’s all like “what are you doing?”

–Washington Square Park

Overheard by: silvver

Indian girl: I need to up my sex number. I either wanna sleep with a professor or a celebrity. (long pause) Wait! Professors are like celebrities!

–72nd and Amsterdam

Overheard by: Vincent

Teen girl to friend: … And then my mom said to me “don’t be a ho.”

–Union Square

Overheard by: Lotte

Girl: She is such a fuckin’ slut. (Pause, then indignantly) How you gonna sleep with someone for four dollars?

–Bergen and Smith

(Native American cop is arresting a black man)
Black man: Fuckin’ discrimination, man! Leave me the fuck alone! I ain’t done nothin wrong!
Native American Cop: Fuck you! We were oppressed first!
Black man: Apache motherfucker!

–82nd St, Queens

Overheard by: Lea

Cute blonde: We should go see The Vagina Monologues.
Awkward Indian man: Yeah, that’s my play!

–Columbia University