Chick: Don’t get too close to Paul because if he busts ass it’s going to smell like Y2K!
–9th Street & 6th Avenue
Chick: Don’t get too close to Paul because if he busts ass it’s going to smell like Y2K!
–9th Street & 6th Avenue
White guy: So, do you have any plans for this evening?
Asian girl: Yeah, being angry!
White guy: Oh, that sounds good.
–Houston & 1st
Overheard by: Kristin
Girl #1: …so, my professor started talking about The Diary of Anne Frank.
Girl #2: Oh, Anne Frank! I used to love her! I had the diary, the notebooks and the pencils and everything.
Queer: What?
Girl #1: I think she means Lisa Frank.
–27th & 7th
Waif #1: Do you have any of that low-carb gum?
Waif #2: That stuff is super fierce.
Waif #1: I know.
–1 train
Guy: The Dead Kennedys are playing tonight. Oh, excuse me: the “Dead Kennedys.”
Girl: Right.
Guy: Like the Dead Kennedys are even the Dead Kennedys without Jello Biafra. It’s like the Misfits without Danzig.
Girl: My sister’s boyfriend knows their drummer.
Guy: You have a sister?
–L train
Girl: Whatever, tell your brother to go back to prison, learn how to read, and then he can talk to me.
Guy: But you egged his car! You egged his fucking car! What kind of bitch eggs someone’s car?
–26th & 8th
Overheard by: Emily Ackerman
Woman: Do you like the perfume I’m wearing?
Man: It smells like a sanitary napkin…Before it’s used, of course.
–Grand Central
Overheard by: Christina Rusnak
Guy #1: …and then I came in and Anne was watching some gay movie with Keanu Reeves and River Phoenix–
Guy #2: Who’s River Phoenix?
Guy #1: You know, Joaquin Phoenix’s brother.
Guy #2: Joaquin Phoenix has a brother?
Guy #1: I guess…
–A train
Guy on cell: Hello?…What do you mean you have bad news?…You’re pregnant? How could you be pregnant?…I thought you were on the Pill? How did this happen?!…I just got engaged to your sister on the 4th of July…This is really bad news…How long have you known?…A week?! Why did you wait a week to tell me?…Your sister is going to go through the roof…No, she doesn’t come back until Monday…So, I’ll see you tonight?…I told you, I just got engaged to your sister. You can’t be pregnant…Okay, have a good afternoon.
He makes another call.
Guy on cell: Hey…You know Claire*?…Yeah, Lauren’s* sister…Yeah, the hot one…Well, she’s pregnant…Me!
–46th between 5th & 6th
Girl, 9: Is that your ADD talking?
Boy, 9: What? I don’t have that disease!
Girl, 9: A-D-D doesn’t spell AIDS!
–1/9 train
Overheard by: Nicole A.
