Queer #1: I kind of like Barack Obama. He’s cute.
Queer #2: If I didn’t have a husband, I would be so far up Barack Obama’s ass that if anyone pulled me out they would become King of England.
–115th & Amsterdam
Overheard by: Nathan
Queer #1: I kind of like Barack Obama. He’s cute.
Queer #2: If I didn’t have a husband, I would be so far up Barack Obama’s ass that if anyone pulled me out they would become King of England.
–115th & Amsterdam
Overheard by: Nathan
Suit #1: She’s smart, funny, beautiful… What more could you ask for?
Suit #2: Yeah, but she probably votes. I don’t like women that vote.
–Union Station
Overheard by: Jacksonian Democracy
Clerk: What’s that symbol on your shirt?
Chick: It says ‘Nepal.’
Clerk: What’s Nepal?
Chick: It’s where the Dalai Lama lives.
Clerk: What’s the Dalai Lama? Is that an animal?
Chick: Yeah, it’s like a Yeti.
Clerk: Oh.
–Pelham Pkwy
Overheard by: raginggoatboy
Nanny: You don’t want to watch the parade?
Little boy: They think… They think… They think the government should give them jobs even though they are from other countries, but they should just go back.
–Immigration march, 14th & Broadway
Overheard by: Matthew K. Johnson
Black guy: Yo, you gotta know Uncle Sam, man. I mean, you pay your taxes, right?
Indian clerk: No, I’m sorry. I don’t know what you’re talking about.
–Deli, 14th & 3rd
Overheard by: hoch
Hobo #1: Hillary is gay and Bill is a lesbian! She straps on a big one and gives it to him right in the ass! … Are you listening to me?
Hobo #2: Yeah. You said Hillary has a big one…
–Deli, 23rd & Lex
Chick on cell: I don’t remember why he put the phone in the oven… I think it was to prove a point. And my mom didn’t know, so she turned the oven on and then the phone caught on fire.
–NYU trolley
Panhandler: Ladies and gentlemen, I’m not trying to get drugs. I’m not trying to buy alcohol. I’m just trying to survive. It’s a hard life out there trying to sleep, and people always trying to set you on fire.
–F train
Guy with Jamaican accent: Women be causin’ the men to be committin’ adultery. Women be causin’ the men to be lustin’ after the butt. Women need to put their butt back into their pants. Women, you need to cover your butt, or it will be covered in fire.
–4 train
Overheard by: The Cannon
NYU politics professor: … So if you want to stay warm out there, you’re free to burn the flag.
–Silver Center, NYU
Guy sprinting to JAP on cell: Ma’am! You’re on fire! [Guy grabs her Vera Bradley purse, on fire from her cigarette, and throws it savagely to the ground.] I’m sorry, but I had to do that. [JAP stares blankly at him and continues cell conversation.]
–Bobst Library, NYU
Overheard by: J-Steve
Tight jeans #1: It’s like the only way to be a punk these days is to be a Republican.
Tight jeans #2: I know.
–2nd Ave, between 7th & 8th St
Overheard by: Tim
Dude #1: I’d kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
Dude #2: Ummm… Hmmm.
–F train
Man #1: … And sometimes you want to drink in the office.
Man #2: Yeah, I mean, sometimes — why not? But that’s a slippery slope.
Man #1: Well, the general rule of thumb is don’t drink and trade.
–Elevator, World Financial Center
Overheard by: Walter Sobjzcek
