Stupidity

Flyer guy to hot blonde chick: Hey, where are you from?
Hot blonde chick, indignantly: Here.
Flyer guy: What are you doing in Times Square?
Hot blonde chick, rudely: Leaving!

–Times Square

Overheard by: Stephen

Man: Do you have bathing suits?
Salesgirl: No… But we have swimming trunks.
Man, sarcastically: Why not? I'll try those.

–6th & 23rd

Preteen boy #1, looking at tiny Yorkie: Wow, that is the smallest thing I've ever seen.
Preteen boy #2: That's what she said.
Preteen boy #1: Yeah, that's what she didn't say about you! I mean, that's what she didn't say to me! That's what she said about you!

–30th Ave, Astoria

Overheard by: real smooth.

Metalhead #1, holding ice cream with fruit punch stain: Shit, am I bleeding?
Metalhead #2: Uhhh… No.
Metalhead #1: Then why is my ice cream red?
Metalhead #3: Dude, you're eating ice cream and drinking Hawaiian Punch.

–Irving Plaza

Overheard by: A metalhead

Five-year-old black girl: Let's play I spy!
Six-year-old black girl: I spy… Something brown!
Five-year-old black girl: The chair!
Six-year-old black girl: No.
Five-year-old black girl: The door!
Six-year-old black girl: No.
Five-year-old black girl: Us!
Six-year-old black girl: No… We're black, stupid!

–Waiting Room, Eye & Ear Hospital

Woman to stranger: Do you know how to get on the High Line?
Man: No, I never use it.

–Chelsea, Under the High Line

Overheard by: Cheryl

Guy in limo: I love your city!
Guy on street: I love your city!
Guy in limo: I love your city!
Guy on street: I love your city, where you from?
Guy in limo: I'm Norwegian.
Guy on street: Norwegia!

–Bleecker & LaGuardia

Overheard by: Josh

Guy #1: Yeah, and then he broke my car.
Guy #2: I guess there had to be a break in the monotony.
Guy #1: Never speak again, Vince.

–Union Square

Overheard by: …

Girl to friend: When I was in 4th grade my teacher made me take the butterflies home to let them grow. What happened? They fucking died! I came back to school and looked like an idiot because I was the only black girl in my class. Leave it to the damn black girl to kill the butterflies and ruin it for the whole class!

–52nd St

Tourist to another, looking at Ellis Island: Look, there is Alcatraz!

–Staten Island Ferry

Little tourist girl to dad: Why are there so many brown people in this city?

–Lexington & 59th St

Tourist: We have made it to the center of the earth!

–Times Square

Overheard by: Lance Torres

Tourist: Wow! Times Square is really busy tonight.

–Times Square

Overheard by: erkala

Teenage tourist: Soooo… It's like a little bus… On rails… That goes in a tunnel?

–42nd & 7th