Teenage boy in Boston Celtics jacket: Ewww, this is Jackson Heights?
Father: Yeah, I guess so.
Bored tween girl: Can we go back to the hotel, puh-lease?
Mom: Not yet. I want to find where Ugly Betty lives.
–Jackson Heights
Overheard by: Jellobelle
Teenage boy in Boston Celtics jacket: Ewww, this is Jackson Heights?
Father: Yeah, I guess so.
Bored tween girl: Can we go back to the hotel, puh-lease?
Mom: Not yet. I want to find where Ugly Betty lives.
–Jackson Heights
Overheard by: Jellobelle
Girl: When I look back on my life, I’m not going to think about trips I went on or relationships I had, I’ll be thinking about television programs I watched.
Guy: That’s horrible!
Girl: Well I was only kidding!
–86th and Lex
Chick on cell: We can’t let Blair and Tootie control our lives!
–LIRR
Overheard by: Poogins
Homeless crazy black guy to three scared white girls in their twenties: Time is crazy. Oh man, what time is "Desperate Housewives" on?!
–10th Street & 3rd Ave
Large latino: Yo, it was so good last night, I mean I can’t believe you missed it. It was the best episode I’ve seen yet, seriously bro… Well the main thing that happened was Heidi tried to apologize to LC and she was all like: "I wanna forget you!" I was like: "Whaaaaaat? For real?" It was crazy, you gotta catch it!
–Times Square Office Building
Overheard by: SUSAN
Redhead: The "Brady Bunch" world is a world without urges.
–Veniero’s, 11th St between 1st & 2nd
Overheard by: Ursula & Winifred
Muscular guy: He comes up to me talking all this shit, saying that he’ll bring it. Bring what? He’s not gangsta like I am, he ain’t thug like me. Skinny motherfucka looks like a damn burnt-out Screech.
–On the Bus
Fulsome girl with bad dye job: I’m like: "I watch ‘Law and Order: SVU’, I’m not getting in your van."
–15th between 6th and 7th
Overheard by: Disunionsquare
Aries Spears, in line for an Ashlee Simpson autograph: I’m the black guy from MADtv! [Grabs a random girl’s camera and snaps a picture of them together and walks away.]
–Virgin Mobile Mega Store, Times Square
Old lady leaving The Tony Danza Show #1: Grazie!
Old lady leaving The Tony Danza Show #2: Why didn’t you wear the right shoes?
Old lady leaving The Tony Danza Show #1: No, no, these are fine.
Old lady leaving The Tony Danza Show #2: Aaaah, blow me. They’re terrible.
–66th between Columbus & Central Park West
Overheard by: MojoSaves
Woman: I used to be delusional.
Friend: What was happening, were you medicated?
Woman: Oh yes, I had to be severely medicated. I thought I was going to marry Peter Jennings.
Friend: Was it hard for you when he died?
Woman: Actually, I was selfishly happy because I didn’t have to worry about having delusions about him anymore.
–W 105th St & Amsterdam Ave
Boyfriend: I guess we can get some stuff at Gristedes, the ghetto grocery.
Girlfriend: Gristedes isn't ghetto! It was on Project Runway!
–Gristedes
Overheard by: Fox
Guy #1: The horse?
Guy #2: SJP.
Guy #1: S…J…
Guy #2: Oh, for God’s sake: Sarah Jessica Parker! Don’t be so innuendo-challenged; nobody will invite you anywhere!
–Bedford & Clymer, Williamsburg
Man #1 (referring to Sarah Palin): Yeah, she's beautiful. She'll eventually become a TV star… Fox'll give her a job.
Man #2: Exactly. I wouldn't want her to be president, but I'd want to see her naked.
–7 Train
Overheard by: emma
Suit on cell: Nah, don’t even bother callin’ that fuckin’ guy. At 4:59 he pulls the steam whistle and slides down the Brontosaurus tail.
–45th & 7th
Overheard by: Fred F.
Homegirl to another: Yo, you remind me of my nigga, SpongeBob!
–125th & Amsterdam
20-something babe: Optimus Prime is my boyfriend!
–Union Square cinema
Suit: The winter after I graduated college I watched a lot of Cartoon Network.
–8th St & 6th Ave
Overheard by: jonesy
Girl: Yeah, you know, it’s just like the time I dyed myself blue, only the guy I was with was colorblind so he couldn’t even tell! Hey, haven’t you ever wanted to know what it feels like to be a Smurf?
–1 train
Fat professor: In order to avoid economic loss you have to look deeper than the average bear.
–Pace University
Overheard by: random student
Chick #1: Eeeeeew, I hate this show!
Chick #2: Me too! Hella boring.
Chick #1: I'm probably going to watch it.
Chick #2: Oh, me too.
–Times Square
