Proud Asian father to friend: And my little one here, he's going to be a football player when he grows up!
Little Asian boy: No way, Jose! I'm gonna be a Power Ranger!
–East Flatbush, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Frado
Proud Asian father to friend: And my little one here, he's going to be a football player when he grows up!
Little Asian boy: No way, Jose! I'm gonna be a Power Ranger!
–East Flatbush, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Frado
Old woman: You had an audition today?
Young woman: Yeah, for the Jerry Springer show. I sang ‘Mama Smacked Me on the Asshole.’
–Starbucks, 43rd & 8th
Teen boy #1: You should be a Pokemon for Halloween.
Teen boy #2: Like Jesus?
–Chambers St.
Little girl: Daddy, are there people inside the big balloons?
Father: Only in Scooby-Doo. He’s a carnivore.
–77th & Columbus
Girl to boy: I just got this computer software that's supposed to, like, speeden my reading comprehension.
Boy to girl: Oh…right, right, I saw that shit on tv.
–147th & Amsterdam
Man #1, pointing to hobo with Down's Syndrome: Hey, that's that one guy from that tv show…
Man #2: Who? That bum?
Man #1: Yeah, that's that whatsits–that Corky guy. Y'know, with the mongoloid syndrome.
Man #2: Wow…
–Houston & Varick
Overheard by: Houston Lunch
Guy: I want to put a flat screen in my bathroom.
Girl: Interesting…
Guy: Maybe I would actually take baths if I had something else to watch other than my penis floating.
–Houston & Norfolk
Overheard by: David Byrne
Teen kid #1: Yo white people have too much free time to do stupid shit.
Teen kid #2: Yeah, I know: like jump off 30-story buildings, like those two kids.
Teen kid #1: Yeah, I once saw this white guy who tried to jump over a car and got split in two, like the car was coming at him, and he tried to jump, but it hit him and split him in two pieces right down the middle.
Teen kid #2: For real, you saw that happen?
Teen kid #1: Yeah.
Teen kid #2: Like in person, you saw it happen?
Teen kid #1: Yeah, I saw it happen in person on TV last night.
–5 Train
Overheard by: b
Teenage boy: I still don't get it, what's green and goes in the tank?
Teenage girl: The turtle.
Teenage boy: The turtle's turquoise…
Teenage girl: Its head is green!
Teenage boy: You do realize we're arguing over a Blue's Clues episode.
–Grand Central Station
Teen #1: So, did your friend come by?
Teen #2: Yeah, for a quick hot minute. And girl, she’s sooo skinny. And she’s pregnant… And she’s a lesbian.
Teen #1: Ohhh…
Teen #2: I told her she could be on Jerry Springer.
–4 train
Overheard by: NinjaRider
