Drunk girl: The other thing you should know about me is I have a raw fucking pussy.
Drunk guy, holding her hand: Yeah? Good.
–St. Mark’s & 2nd Ave
Overheard by: Bex
Drunk girl: The other thing you should know about me is I have a raw fucking pussy.
Drunk guy, holding her hand: Yeah? Good.
–St. Mark’s & 2nd Ave
Overheard by: Bex
Hobo: Can you spare some change?
Boyfriend: No, sorry. [Hobo walks away.] That’s the second person to ask me for money today already.
Girlfriend: Yeah, people are really poor today.
–Union Square
Overheard by: Amber
Hipster chick #1: Oh, so how did your pregnancy test thing go?
Hipster chick #2: It went really well, actually.
Hipster chick #1: Oh, really?
Hipster chick #2: Yeah, my manager emailed me and said it was the best thing I’ve ever done, which totally made my day.
–Broadway & Astor Pl
Overheard by: trailing behind
Dude #1: My girlfriend is allergic to gluten.
Dude #2: Having a girlfriend with a food allergy is worse than having a girlfriend with a dick!
–11th St & Ave B
Bimbette #1: I know you guys made out and had sex. You had a little crush.
Bimbette #2: Well, he was nice to me.
–12th & 4th
NYU girl #1: … And then she, like, bled all over my shit.
NYU girl #2: Oh my god, that is disgusting!
NYU girl #1: Oh, I know.
–E 7th & 2nd Ave
Geek #1: Wow. You’ve got a death metal shirt on top of a death metal shirt on top of another death metal shirt!
Geek #2: No, it’s a black metal shirt on top of a death metal shirt on top of another black metal shirt!
Geek #1: Oh! It’s a sandwich!
–Grassroots, St. Mark’s Pl
Overheard by: Meli$$a
Chick #1: So he just threw his shoes out?!
Chick #2: Yeah, he said he would never dance again.
Hobo: Never dance again!
–St. Mark’s & 2nd Ave
40-something: Okay, lemme get two grande black coffees.
Barista: $4.10.
40-something: You know what? Make those ventis.
Barista: $4.44.
40-something: Okay, don’t kill me, but could I get one grande and one venti?
Barista: No.
40-something: What?
Barista: No.
40-something: You know, two ventis is perfect.
–Starbucks, Union Square
Woman: Breastfeeding her baby is not the same as taking a shit.
Man: Yeah, it is. It’s like shitting in the baby’s mouth.
–3rd & 2nd
