U.S. Geography

Suit #1: You know why this three day weekend is so great?
Suit #2: Because it’s three days?
Suit #1: No, because the kids will be in school.
Suit #2: They don’t give them Columbus Day?
Suit #1: Nope. I guess because they get off for the Jewlidays.
Suit #2: Must be a Jersey thing.

–Madison between 55th & 56th

Little boy: I loved Philadelphia! Mommy, why don’t we move there? I wish we lived there!
Yuppie mom: No you don’t, sweetie. Philadelphia is kind of the ghetto.

–Port Authority

Overheard by: daile

Drunk dude: Where are you from?
Chick: Pittsburgh.
Drunk dude: Oh, no kidding! [Points to his friend] He’s from Minnesota, too!
Friend: No, actually, I’m from Texas.
Drunk dude: Whatever — that’s still close to Minnesota, isn’t it? Or Michigan or whatever.
Chick: … Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

–1 train

Overheard by: Chiara

HS girl #1: So exactly how many states are there?
HS girl #2: 52.
HS girl #3: I thought there were only 50.
HS girl #2: That’s because they never count Haiti and Cuba.

–F train

Overheard by: Ting

Midwood girl #1: Hey, where is Maryland anyway?
Midwood girl #2: It’s in D.C. somewhere.
Midwood girl #1: Oh, right.

–Flatbush bagel shop

Overheard by: Ford Madox Hueffer

Yuppie: Like, why do we even have Pennsylvania?

–5th Avenue/53rd St. station

Overheard by: Jamie

Girl #1: Where are you from, again?
Girl #2: Kentucky.
Girl #1: Oh, no…that didn’t get by the tornado, did it?

–Shades of Green, E. 15th Street

Overheard by: Emily

Woman: Oh, this is great. We got on a nonstop train to Trenton. Just what I fuckin’ need in my life right now. It’s OK, we’ll just go see our nation’s capital.
Random man: Our nation’s capital?
Woman: You know I meant state. I don’t need comments from the fuckin’ peanut gallery. I went to high school. I graduated with fuckin’ honors.

–NJ Transit train, Penn Station

Overheard by: Another fuckin’ honor student

Girl #1: I hate my life! I need to go out there! Like drive to Hawaii!
Girl #2: You can't drive to Hawaii, you don't even have a license!

–Bedford & N 8th

Overheard by: Bklynguts

Random guy: So, where you from?
Hot chick: Oh, up north. Florida.
Random guy: Wait. I thought Florida was in the Midwest.

–Subway B