Redhead: I wish I was a pirate.
Brunette: No, you don’t. Pirates are dirty. They don’t have toothbrushes.
Redhead: Yeah… But they drink so much alcohol that it kills the bacteria in their mouths anyway.
Brunette: Really? Well, they still don’t have health insurance…
–FIT dorm
Teen girl #1: So, last night we were talking, and he still wants to put it in my ass… Like, how could I be with someone who only thinks about shoving his thing up my ass?
Teen girl #2: So what are you gonna do?
Teen girl #1: I don’t know! Help me!
Teen girl #2, puzzled: I thought you love anal sex?
Teen girl #1: Oh, yeah.
–S79 bus
Overheard by: rob l
Bimbette #1: Oh my god, this is a shirt? I thought it was a dress!
Bimbette #2: And that’s because you’re a slut.
Bimbette #1: No, seriously, I could rock this as a dress.
Bimbette #2: Here we go again.
–42nd & Lex
Overheard by:
Bimbette: Yeah, well, I don’t give head.
Guy: Oh, why? You don’t like it?
Bimbette: No, it’s just that I’m afraid to get pregnant!
–78th & 41st
Overheard by: rain
Eye candy: Why would he say that I was not educated?
Friend: Well, that’s not exactly what he said, now was it?
Eye candy: No, he said I was tapid and voided of thought.
Friend: Vapid and devoid of thought.
Eye candy: Same thing.
–Manhattan-bound F train
Overheard by: SandmanEsq
Blonde #1: Of course there are 50 states. Duh!
Blonde #2: Yeah… Wait, what state is Florida in?
–Penn Station
Chick #1: You know how they say Chinese people are yellow? Like, yellow-skinned?
Chick #2: Yeah.
Chick #1: Then how come they always look so pale? Like, that girl from House of Flying Daggers is totally pale.
Chick #2: But she’s in a house of, like, flying daggers. I’d be pale.
–6 train
Girl #1: I walked in on my boy masturbating while we where getting ready for sex.
Girl #2: Oh my god, I love masturbating before sex. It’s like a free orgasm.
Girl #1: Me, too. It’s, like, spiritual in my family.
–4th St & Park Ave
Teen girl #1: Yeah, Florida is totally North of New York.
Teen girl #2: Are you kidding me? No, it’s not.
Teen girl #1: Yeah, it is! I mean, like, you drive North to the airport, right? And South of New York is just, like… water.
Teen girl #2, staring in disbelief: Wow.
–5th Ave
Overheard by: Shocked
Chick #1: … And I’m just trying to make myself a virgin again, you know?
Chick #2: Yeah, I know.
–St. James Pl
