Man I know what’s wrong with your neck.
Woman: Yeah?
Man: You slept on it funny and then you breathed in, you know? You get an air bubble in your neck when you do that.
Woman: Really?
–Food Emporium, Greenwich Street
Man I know what’s wrong with your neck.
Woman: Yeah?
Man: You slept on it funny and then you breathed in, you know? You get an air bubble in your neck when you do that.
Woman: Really?
–Food Emporium, Greenwich Street
Guy #1: Man, how you gonna play like a kid came on to you? A four year old can’t even get it up.
Guy #2: How do you know? You hit on a four year old?
Guy #1: Nah, man. I was one.
–Elevator, Hudson & Houston
Overheard by: Michele
Chick #1: There was too much talking in that movie and not enough action.
Chick #2: Yeah. It was all like too much communism and shit.
–AMC Empire 25, West 42nd Street
Overheard by: Nico Westerdale
Crazy guy: Yeah, I don’t have to remember. I know. What are you looking at? I’m gonna kill you, you keep it up, I’m gonna kill you. I don’t need to be no CIA, FBI, Special Agent Man, whatever the fuck you got. I battle evil! I’m gonna kill you.
Man from window: Shut up!
Crazy guy: Fuck you. I battle evil! I battle evil every day. You’re a coward. I’m gonna blow up that building. I don’t like evil. I’m a peaceful man and I battle evil.
Man from window: Go away then.
Crazy guy: I battle evil!
–10th St between 1st & A
Overheard by: A guy trying to be invisible while standing right next to the crazy guy
Woman: Wait, aren’t dinosaurs mammals?
Man: Um. They’re reptiles, honey.
Woman: Oh. Right.
Man: You have two master’s degrees?
Woman: But not in lizardology!
–Union Square
Overheard by: djlindee
Woman #1: I really wish they wouldn’t let musicians play here.
Woman #2: Why?
Woman #1: I mean, seriously, it’s such an invasion of my privacy.
–42nd Street 1/2/3 station
Teen girl #1: Do they card here?
Teen girl #2: Yeah, but they don’t card the Asians.
Teen girl #1: Isn’t that racist?
Teen girl #2: No, that’s like…affirmative action or something like that.
–M2M, East 11th Street
Overheard by: evan t
JAP #1: So then he like…stuck his stick up her hoo-ha!
JAP #2: Like in her area? You mean he went for the cash and prizes?
JAP #1: Yeah! So he like… hit her there with his stick, and she spun around and was like, “What the fuck?”, but then was like, “Oh, you’re blind.” But I don’t care. It’s fucked up.
–University & Waverly
Overheard by: tj
Drunk guy on cell: Hello?
Lady on speaker: Larry, where are you? When are you coming home?
Drunk guy on cell: Who’s this?
–Russian Vodka Room, West 52nd Street
Suit #1: I’ve never had a hooker before.
Suit #2: Neither have I but I feel ready now.
–Bleecker & Grove
Overheard by: ED Aston
