Manhattan

Guy #1: Anyways, how’s Coco?
Guy #2: I don’t have Coco anymore man. I got a new dog.
Guy #1: Really? What happened to Coco?
Guy #2: Coco hung himself.

–Waverly & Mercer

Overheard by: Noah Lagin

Woman: Hey, that looks like my metallic vagina sculpture.

–Karkula, Gansevoort St

Overheard by: stampy

Loud girl: I would like to see something a little bit more modern. This isn’t modern enough for me.

–MoMA

Chick #1: NYU is taking over the city. Soon they’re gonna have to
start calling it “New York” City.
Chick #2: It’s already called New York City!

–4th & Broadway

Overheard by: Kelly Raz

Girl #1: I don’t normally carry a bag of vomit with me as a weapon.
Girl #2: We should market that.

–54th & 7th

Guy #1: Do you have a light?
Guy #2: I don’t think you should smoke, this is a cancer walk.
Guy #1: Yes, but it’s not for lung cancer.

–South Street Seaport

Nice guy #1: Hey, miss, would you like my seat?
Preggers: No.
Nice guy #2: Here, take mine. I’m getting off soon.
Preggers: For the love of God, I fucking said no! People these days gotta learn themselves some English.

–Bronx-bound 4 train

Girl #1: Sara, everything’s not about you.
Girl #2: Everything’s relevant to me.

–Fordham University, Lincoln Center

Overheard by: Trix

Little boy #1: Your pants are so tight, your balls have asthma.
Little boy #2: But that’s my joke…

–12th between A & B

Tech guy #1: I left my bike at the PATH station over the weekend.
Tech guy #2: Was it stolen?
Tech guy #1: No, but all the wheels are missing.

–Office, Madison & 47th

Overheard by: Will

B&T girl: Oh my god, is that Kramer?
B&T guy: Oh yeah, hey, I think it is.
Man: That’s Elliott fucking Gould.

–Katz’s Deli, Houston Street