Girl #1: But I secretly like when guys check me out.
Girl #2: What about Steven*?
Girl #1: Oh yeah… He's like a lesbian, who knows.
–Hunter College
Girl #1: But I secretly like when guys check me out.
Girl #2: What about Steven*?
Girl #1: Oh yeah… He's like a lesbian, who knows.
–Hunter College
Guy driving by: Is that the line for the liquor store?!
Large black lady in fancy fur coat: Naw, it's for cheese, muthafucka!
–Outside Liquor Store, 145th and Broadway
Overheard by: Madame Veuve Cliquot
Cute blond girl, hearing loud scream: What kid is throwing a temper tantrum? Jesus!
Boyfriend: No, that's just a crackhead.
Cute blond girl: Oh.
–Shake Shack, Madison Square Park
Overheard by: Noelle
Young female 20-something to another: Don't you ever learn anything? You can't sleep with your boss!
–42nd & Madison
Overheard by: Eric S
Guy to another, outside Apple store: Well, first you have to find him, then fund him, and then fuck him.
–14th St
Girl on cell: I've had really bad first base that turned into really good sex.
–LIRR
Overheard by: Rob Gioia
Woman in too-tight business suit, screaming into cell: Listen, buddy, I can always find another fuck buddy!
–Upper West Side
Overheard by: Nunez
Business casual 30-something #1: What is this, a halfway house?
Business casual 30-something #2: No, man, that's Chipotle.
–St. Mark's
Young pretty brunette: I think that I'm anemic, I bruise so easily.
Young ditzy blonde: Oh my god! You, like, starve yourself?
Young pretty brunette: I literally felt myself get dumber after you said that. I don't understand why I associate myself with morons.
–Starbucks, 51st & Broadway
Teenage thug #1, to friends: Yo, you know who Dumbledore is?
Teenage thug #2: Ummm, yes!
Teenage thug #1: So what's his full name?
Teenage thug #3: Okay! Here it comes!
Teenage thug #4: Yeah, this is the shit right here!
All thugs, in unison: Albus… Percival… Wulfric… Brian… Dumbledore!
Teenage thug #1: That's what I'm talking about! Yeah!
–Sunset Park, Brooklyn
Overheard by: even i didn't remember
Girl #1: Those are like really nice cars.
Girl #2: Oh, yeah. They're like Toyotas, right?
Girl #1: No.
–Mercedes-Benz Showroom, Park Ave
Overheard by: Lydia
Australian tourist to hobo on bench: Oh, shit, where am I?
Hobo on bench: Welcome to hell, lady.
Australian tourist to hobo: No, mate, I just flew in from there yesterday.
–Central Park
Flyer guy to hot blonde chick: Hey, where are you from?
Hot blonde chick, indignantly: Here.
Flyer guy: What are you doing in Times Square?
Hot blonde chick, rudely: Leaving!
–Times Square
Overheard by: Stephen
