Questions

GOP Chick #1: It’s not so much the church as the people.
GOP Chick #2: What’s wrong with the people?
GOP Chick #1: There’s a lot of singles.

–New York Young Republicans Party, Flatiron District

A guy and a girl are standing next to each other, waiting to cross the street. She’s wearing a winter jacket, scarf and hat.

Guy: You’re in trouble.
Girl: Why?
Guy: What the fuck are you going to do when it gets cold?

–Times Square

Overheard by: Anna Ryan

Old school Brooklyn guy: They closed off 150 blocks in DC for this inauguration and where do you think all the people that live on those blocks are gonna park, if not here in the five boroughs?

–Greenpoint

Overheard by: Didi Hylobates

Protestor: I really want to get arrested. What do you think I should do?

–After a protest outside Stuyvesant Church, East Village

Mom: I don’t know. I think you have to be, like, 21 to go to outer space.

–83rd & Amsterdam

A six-year-old stops coughing and asks: Mommy, why did you cover my mouth?

–Q Train

Guy #1: I got a cough.
Guy #2: You got a cough?
Guy #1: Yeah, I got one.
Guy #2: I wonder if it’s the same one I got.
Guy #1: It’s a cough.

–LES

Overheard by: David Bowman

Middle schooler on field trip: Oh my god, we're gonna get knifed.

–Times Square

Woman on cell: Do you have any chainsaws I can borrow?

–38th & 2nd

Harley Davidson dude to another: So I stabbed that guy, and that guy, and then that guy.

–7th St & Bedford Ave

Overheard by: NYCQ

Woman on cell: Today is not the day. I can't come to 14th Street or I'll stab you.

–42nd St & Ave of the Americas

Overheard by: Matthew

Woman in dress, after smooching with guy: But how?
Guy: Don't worry baby, I already told about you to my wife.
Woman in dress: Aww, baby…

–31st St & Broadway

Girl #1: But I secretly like when guys check me out.
Girl #2: What about Steven*?
Girl #1: Oh yeah… He's like a lesbian, who knows.

–Hunter College

Guy driving by: Is that the line for the liquor store?!
Large black lady in fancy fur coat: Naw, it's for cheese, muthafucka!

–Outside Liquor Store, 145th and Broadway

Overheard by: Madame Veuve Cliquot