Race

Ghetto guy #1: Yo, you think that bitch is gonna blow up the train?
Ghetto guy #2: Nah, negro, she’s white.

–A train

Spanish guy: I dunno, man. Maybe that Chinese kid farted egg roll?

–Chambers & West

Overheard by: adam dorn

Queer: But wait, is English a race?
Guy passerby: Holy shit, that’s going on Overheard tomorrow.

–Bleecker & 6th Ave

Overheard by: Guy passerby #2

Guy: My dog is so racist. She is scared of black people. But she also hates the black people of dogs.
Girl: What does that even mean?
Guy: Pugs.

–33rd & 8th

Hobo: I need some money to buy food. Please help a brother out with any change you have.
Little girl: Hey mister, you were just in here.
Hobo: No, I wasn’t. All homeless people don’t look the same, you know!
Little girl: But you all dress the same.

–E train

Overheard by: Nina

Little girl #1: He took out everything after we bought the house. The refrigerator, the stove, the toilet…
Little girl #2: Was he Korean? I mean, I’m Korean but that sounds so Korean.
Little girl #1: Nah, he was Italian.
Little girl #2: Koreans, Italians, French…no difference.

–Flushing

White guy: Dude, I’m going to be the only non-Asian at this party.
Asian guy: No, man, there are going to be tons of Koreans there.

–6 train

Overheard by: Elisabeth

A chick been caught stealing by security. For some inexplicable reason, they let her yell at them.

Chick: This is not the United States of White-ass Bitches; this is the United States of America.

Chick: I’m owed this shirt because I’m black, bitches. I don’t owe nothin’ to you white folks. I’m owed this shirt because of slavery.

–Banana Republic, Broadway & Prince

Overheard by: helen r.

McGuy: Hey, hey, watch your step!
Woman #1: …Hey, that guy just told you not to step in that.
Woman #2: Oops! Oh, but who pays attention to Mexicans in restaurants?

–McDonalds, Manhattan Mall

Jewish man: But I was here first! I was waiting!
Black chick: All right sir, just calm down. It doesn’t matter. Get a life.
Jewish man: Why don’t you go back to jail?
Black chick: Yeah, and why don’t you go get some viagra or something?
Jewish man: Yeah, I’d need it for you.
Black chick: Fuck you, bitch!

–Court Street Office Supplies, Brooklyn Hights

Overheard by: mrmcd

Hobo: Stop! I don’t want any money, I don’t want anything. I just want you to look. You will never see this again in your life!

He points to a window sill where he has four quarters standing on their edges.

Hobo: Isn’t that beautiful?

–Christopher & Bleecker

Overheard by: gizzard