Puzzled student: Professor, according to the syllabus we have a paper due in a week… What's it on?
Equally puzzled philosophy professor: You have a paper due in a week? I was afraid of that!
Puzzled student: Also, according to the syllabus, we don't even have class today. There's…nothing written there.
Equally puzzled philosophy professor: Really? Huh. Well, I must have been drunk when I did that.
–Fordham University
Sorority girl #1 texting on cell: I hate how words can sometimes spell other words.
Sorority girl #2: Yeah, I know.
–NYU
Female art student: I love people who fit into a stereotype!
Flamingly gay art student: I like being racist.
Female art student: What?!
–NYU
Professor: So there's this study that says that left-handed people have lower evolutionary fitness.
Student: Does that mean that we're doomed because the President is left handed?
Professor, without missing a beat: No, it just means he's going to die.
–Columbia University
College Professor: Do you have any brothers or sisters?
Female Student: I have one sister and a twin brother.
College Professor: Are you identical?
–American Musical & Dramatic Academy, UWS
Greenpeace guy: I know you care!
Cute NYU girl (apathetically): Ehhhhh…
Greenpeace guy: You have ideals!
Cute NYU girl (even more apathetically): Ehhhh…
(Greenpeace guy looks downfallen)
Cute NYU girl (still walking): I like…your mittens.
–14th St b/w 3rd & 4th
Overheard by: not an idealist
Professor, after student coughs: Yes. Yes. I'm just getting over my cold. You saw me! In the theater, I was a row ahead of you!
Student: Yeah…
Professor, with infinite sadness: I had a coughing fit. I…I just…melted. I melted.
–NYU
Schoolgirl #1: You know that girl in our global class?
Schoolgirl #2: The one with the face.
Schoolgirl #1: Yeah!
–Outside of Murry Bergatrum High School
NYU girl: There's not enough time. You can't get lunch.
NYU boy (running towards a hot dog cart): I can. I'm hungry!
NYU girl (shouting after him): You're fat!
–Washington Square Park
Girl on cell: No, no, I’m not anywhere near there…No, I’m in Manhattan City, visiting a school.
–NYU Bookstore, Washington Place
Overheard by: Meghan
