Tattoos

A blonde bumpkin boy stared silently at the heavily tatooed skinhead for 10 minutes before he made his observation: You know what you are? You’re a human doodle pad!

–PATH train to Hoboken

Overheard by: Margo Channing

Meathead Yankees fan #1: Hey, did you know I got a tattoo? (shows friend tattoo)
Meathead Yankees fan #2: No, man! When did you get it?
Meathead Yankees fan #1: A while ago. I was actually on my way to Pep Boys, and I stopped in a shop, and came out with a tattoo.

–A Train

Overheard by: Traczie

Slutty girl: I think someone should have a tattoo over their asshole that says ‘Do Not Enter.’
Friend: I nominate you.

–Fulton & Water St

Overheard by: Anon

HS Girl: That’s all she talks about. She watches Star Trek, she talks about Star Trek, she gets Star Trek tattoos all over her body.
HS Guy: At least my tattoo is cool.

–4 Train

Overheard by: Kaitlen

Curly teen: Did you see that guy with tattoos all over his face? Do you think he's allowed above 14th Street?
Brunette teen: I think he can get to 23rd without too much damage.
Curly teen: No way, Chelsea is too classy to handle that.
Brunette teen: Not really. They did just open up a Chipotle.

–Union Square

Guy: What does that tattoo say?
Chick: *Sigh* I promised myself I’d never get a tattoo unless I had a kid. Then I got a dog. It says Roxy. That’s her name. Now I have to explain to everyone how I’m the biggest loser in the world.

–LES

Little girl: Where’s mommy?
Father: I told you, sweetie. Mommy’s getting her new tattoo.

–10 St & 6th Ave

Young thug #1: Everyone is getting tattoos! Everyone!
Young thug #2: Like who?
Young thug #1: Dave. He just got another tat. I want a tat!
Young thug #2: So, why don't you get one?
Young thug #1: I can't… (whispers) My mom won't let me.
Young thug #2: Shit, nigga, fuck your mother. You can get a tat and be a good guy. I'm a good guy. My record is sealed!

–Deli, Park Slope

Man (to hipstress): You should get a tattoo of Ben Franklin.

–22nd & Park Ave South

Overheard by: Matt Law

Fat Slob: I think I love you, babe. Ooh, that tattoo is cute. “Rot in Peace.”

–Post Office, Bensonhurst