Little girl: And god loves everybody. God even loves you.
Scary little boy: I'm going to kill you.
Little girl: God will love you, even if you do.
Round Rock, Texas
Chick on cell phone: My roommate was rolling a lint roller all over her head for like ten minutes and finally I was like: “What the fuck are you doing? You’re gonna pull all your hair out!” … Haha yeah… She threatened to kill me if I asked her anymore questions… She probably watches me sleep.
UB Bus
Buffalo, New York
Five-year-old little boy to grandmother: If I ever meet George Bush, I'm going to kick him in the balls.
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/309168161/better-wait-a-few-years-or-youll-just-get-his-kneecaps.html
Overheard by: trying not to laugh parent
Father, dragging boy for being naughty: I have had enough of this! You're a horrible child!
Son: But I won't do it again, I promise! (cries hysterically)
Father: Yes, you said that 13 times ago, but you still do it! You're a horrible boy, so we're going to disown you.
Son: Nooooo!
Father: Shut up.
Telford
England
Overheard by: nicmunn
Gay guy: I told them not to have hip-hop night cause a bitch would get cut. And what happened? A bitch got cut!
Outside The Hippo
Mt. Vernon, Mayrland
Roid Rager, angrily: Nobody gives me the finger while I'm driving!
Hipster, calmly: Well, you need to slow down. It's a parking lot.
Roid Rager, enraged: You wanna do something about it?
Hipster: No. I'm not gonna fight you in front of Sears.
Rockaway Mall, New Jersey
Overheard by: Joe Bagodonuts
White geek girl: I swear, if it's the goddamn Macarena, I'm gonna cap a bitch!
Highlands Ranch, Colorado
Goth teen girl: If you don’t come back to me, I’ll kill myself.
Exasperated teen guy: Why the fuck do you do this shit to me?
Friend: Don’t listen to her. She’s always killing herself.
East Bay Diner
Oceanside, New York
Overheard by: Big Larry
Woman: The Italian mafia are making me conduct the trains!
Subway Station
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: Meech
Woman to ten-year-old son: When I'm old and feeble, will you take me in and take care of me?
Ten-year-old son: No. I'm going to put you in a home with a bunch of Asian people.
Chesapeake, Virginia
Overheard by: Kids these days.
