Black guy: Yo, you know what ‘FUBU’ stand for?
Black girl: Yeah, ‘For Us, by Us.’
Black guy: Naw, it stand for ‘Farmers Used to Beat Us.’
Black girl: It does not! It’s ‘For Us, by Us’!
Black guy: That’s what they want you to think. Everybody knows it’s ‘Farmers Used to Beat Us.’
Black girl: There ain’t no ‘T’ in ‘FUBU’!
Black guy: That don’t matter.
Black girl: You ign’ant, nigga!
–Midtown
Overheard by: Greg Reeves
Mother to friend: So, I had a hot flash the other day, and I was like, ‘Oh my god! Am I going through menopause?’ and–
Son: –Mom! What does ‘menopause’ mean? [Mother ignores him.] If you don’t tell me, I’ll yell it in public until you do!
–Starbucks
Girl on cell: I have that freshly fucked feeling.
–The Gap, Bensonhurst
Lady on cell: Do you remember the guy who used to be in Grand Central all the time? The one with the doll… The doll he would fuck. He and the doll would do a fuck dance. He had it strapped to him at all times.
–Outside NYU dorm, E 14th St
Overheard by: college graduate
White trash gas station attendant: Life got a lot easier once I decided not to give a fuck.
–233rd St & Jerome Ave
Overheard by: Patrick Di Justo
Suit to another: Whatever, it’s New York. I’m expecting to get told ‘F-you’ like 17 times.
–LaGuardia airport
Overheard by: Raja
Ghetto girl licking fingers and lips after consuming hot dog: Mmm, girrrl… I fucked that hot dog up!
–Mercer and W. 4th
Dude: Ma… Ma, I only used the F-word once, Ma. I’m fucking serious here.
–44th & Broadway
Overheard by: Tourist from Canadia
Little boy shouting to friend across the street: I just learned how to say ‘Fuck’!
–Irving & Greene, Bushwick
Overheard by: Andy
Ghetto chick #1: Hey, Shonondra?
Ghetto chick #2: Yeah?
Ghetto chick #1: Is fiction the troof?
–Subway platform, 14th St & 6th Ave
Overheard by: jim
Rich woman #1: Sodomized? Sodomy?
Rich woman #2: Dahmer. That’s who you’re thinking of. Jeffrey Dahmer.
–6 train, 23rd St
Coworker #1: I just found out what ‘queef’ means.
Coworker #2: You’re on speakerphone.
Coworker #1: Queef, queef, queef, queef.
–Midtown office
Overheard by: Ruth
Bar patron dude: No, I don’t think you’re using that right. A ‘moment of clarity’ is a concept from Alcoholics Anonymous.
Bartender chick: But you’re not an alcoholic! So your moment of clarity is when you finally get served booze!
–Library bar, Houston & Ave A
Overheard by: E.Vill. Genius
Dork #1 snickering and pointing at deli awning: D and D deli!
Dork #2: I gotta get a picture of that!
–Soho
Woman #1: It’s hot as Haiti in this store.
Woman #2: What?
Woman #1: Isn’t it supposed to be hot there?
Woman #2: I think you mean ‘Hades.’
Woman #1: No. It’s a place in the Caribbean.
–Banana Republic, 42nd St & Park Ave
Overheard by: Not Haitian
Bimbette: I think Sandy* has dyslexia.
Friend: How do you know? You’re not in any of her classes.
Bimbette: I know, but she’s just so skinny.
–Madison Ave
