Guy: So, for New Year’s…
Bimbette: Yeah, well, I don’t want to do any of that Times Square stuff — it’s really scary there. All those terrorists…
–Joe’s Shanghai, Chinatown
Overheard by: soup dumpling
Guy: So, for New Year’s…
Bimbette: Yeah, well, I don’t want to do any of that Times Square stuff — it’s really scary there. All those terrorists…
–Joe’s Shanghai, Chinatown
Overheard by: soup dumpling
Guy on cell: No, no, no! He said they came to search him and he swallowed it.
–Sullivan & Bleecker
Teen girl at human limbs exhibit: Hmmm, I’m hungry.
–Bodies Exhibit, South St Seaport
Frat boy on cell: I miss you, baby. I love ya. I want to taste your saliva. Call me later when you’re drunk.
–University Pl & 14th St
Overheard by: Erin
Bimbette lighting a cigarette: This probably isn’t what I should be having for breakfast.
–14th St & 1st Ave
Man on cell: Have you talked about coating her in peanut butter and jelly and eating her like a sandwich? No? Okay.
–Starbucks, Court St, Brooklyn
Overheard by: MmmSandwich
Mom: Who’s the yummiest baby in the world? Is it you? Are you super-duper yummy?
–115th St & Broadway
NYC woman: We’re here!
Southern tourist bimbo: Laura, I thought we were here to get cheap fake purses?
NYC woman: We are — this is Chinatown.
Southern tourist bimbo: Why are there so many Chinese people?
NYC woman, slowly: This is Chinatown…
Southern tourist bimbo: Laura! You know I hate Chinese people!
–Canal St
Overheard by: The Wizard
Bimbette #1: My brain hurts. That Chemistry test made me think too much.
Bimbette #2: Well, yeah. I mean, you were using it, and it is the largest muscle in the human body.
Bimbette #1: Oh, right.
Bimbette #2: Wait… Or is it the heart?
Bimbette #1: No, I think your brain is definitely bigger. But who cares, I just want to pop some Advil.
–NYU
Overheard by: Amateur Brain Cardiologist
Hobo: You go to USC? I used to go there, man. Of course, I didn’t graduate… Don’t major in Chemistry. Also, don’t smoke crack.
–Grand Central
Overheard by: not planning on it
Conductor: If you do not fit through the physics of the train, please step aside — this train is not made of spandex.
–F train
Overheard by: BellaFrancine
Bimbette: I could change the world if I just opened my Biology book.
–Dorm room, Columbia campus
Overheard by: college girl
Elegant 20-ish black chick on cell: Do you truly expect me to come out to New Jersey so I can drink Rolling Rock? And listen to Matchbox 20? With a bunch of white bitches? Who majored in Psychology? … How many things are wrong with that?
–Salvation Army store, Waverly Place
Overheard by: Patrick Di Justo
Girl #1: Have you ever had a ‘sandy eggo’?
Girl #2: Ummm… What’s that?
Girl #1: Just guess from the name!
Girl #2: Uh… A whale’s vagina?
–1 train
Girl #1: That is such a cute shirt.
Girl #2: Thanks, but it’s actually a dress.
Girl #1: Is it?
Girl #2: Well, I hope so, because I’m not wearing any pants.
–NYU
Chick #1: Are you feeling better? You looked really sick last night.
Chick #2: Yeah, I felt like I got hit by a Tonka truck.
Chick #1: A Tonka truck?
Chick #2: Well, you know, I always exaggerate.
Chick #1, laughing: A Tonka truck is a toy. I think you mean a mack truck.
Chick #2: … No wonder people look at me weird when I say that.
–Ten’s World Class Cabaret
NYU bimbette #1: Why is it called ‘Deutschland’ if the people there aren’t Dutch?
NYU bimbette #2: Because the German name for Germany is ‘Deutschland.’
NYU bimbette #1: Oh… So, then… why don’t they just call it ‘Germany’?
–Washington Square Park
Airhead #1: Where is the tree?
Airhead #2: It’s not here!
–Next to the unlit Christmas tree, Rockefeller Center
Overheard by: Lalaith
