Two Chinese men sit down on the bench next to a sleeping homeless man trying to sleep.
Hobo: Ah, hell no! You’re not going to start having a conversation like that at 3 in the fuckin’ morning…I ain’t got no motherfucking subtitle button on me!
–49th Street station
Overheard by: Schweiz
Son: Mom, can I go and see Santa?
Mom: You ain’t sittin’ your big black ass on some white Santa!
–Amsterdam Ave
Overheard by: Confused white person
Creepy white teacher: And so the black people started to spread from Harlem. And now there are black people in all five boroughs.
–205 & Reservoir, the Bronx
Hobo to parked white-on-white Mini Cooper: Hate car! Racist car! Bigot car!
–4th St & 1st Ave
Overheard by: benjamen walker
Girl on cell: I don’t care if I am as white as a bar of soap, I can say bangin’ all I want.
–35th St & 23rd Ave, Astoria
Overheard by: Rick Adams
Chick #1: We can watch Lackawanna Blues tonight.
Chick #2: I can’t watch another black movie. I watched one last night.
Chick #1: What’d you watch last night?
Chick #2: Hitch.
–Office, Wall & William
Long Island woman #1: What is this?
Long Island woman #2: Trust me; it’s good for you. I mean, look at these people…Have you ever seen them fat?!
–Korean grocery, 72nd & Broadway, Jackson Heights
Overheard by: DJ Lee, one of ‘these’ people
White guy #1 So what did we come here to get?
White guy #2: I don’t know. I hate buying video games. It makes me feel Asian.
–Gamestop
Overheard by: gamegirl
Guy: She did this album made up entirely of processed sex noises. It’s her and her boyfriend having sex in various sundry ways. She got mentioned in a British newspaper and then the Daily News picked it up. And now it looks like she’s going to have a record deal. Most of it is…it’s kind of German, you know?
–27th Street office
Blonde: Well, I want to visit that country where they speak African!
Redhead: Oh, you want to go to Africa to learn how to speak African? That is so cool.
Black businessman shaking his head: Africa is a continent, not a country, [sighs], and there is no language called ‘African.’
Black businessman departs at 34th Street.
Blonde: How’s he going to tell me that when we went to college and he didn’t? Plus, I heard President Bush call Africa a country in a speech.
–A train, 14th St
Overheard by: LDofHarlem
Woman: I want to report that there is a drawing of Hitler at the bottom of these stairs.
MTA lady: Well, is there anything anti-Semitic written with the drawing?
–225th Street 1 station
Overheard by: adam
Woman on cell: Yeah, I have to go. I’m too distracted on the phone, and I don’t trust anyone in this terminal. People are speaking Spanish behind me, if you know what I mean.
–LaGuardia
