Little boy: What’s the “n word,” Dad?
Dad: I’m not gonna tell you.
Little boy: Why?
Mom: It’s worse than all the other words because it makes specific people feel bad.
Dad: You don’t need to know it. It’s one of those things you’ll learn when you get older. You’ll learn a lot of bad things when you get older.
–Barnes and Noble, Astor Place
Overheard by: Ben
You’ll learn all this and more, at 7PM on Wednesday night at the store above. Please come join us as we discuss and sign our new book.
Guy: That the fucking bitch that called the cops on me! That fucking bitch called the cops! You! White trash! White trash! White trash!
Chick: I always knew you were a bigot.
–St. George, SI
Girl #1: Look at the clerk…You know what they say about Chinese
clerks…
Girl #2: Shh, Jord, let’s not be racist in public.
–Blockbuster, 56th & 1st
Crazy guy: Only God lives forever! You do not understand!
Drunk girl: Sir, would you like a balloon?
Crazy guy: Those balloons are beautiful. You keep them…Only God lives forever! You white people do not understand!
–N train
Overheard by: Lee
Tween girl: Why isn’t she smiling?
Mom: Honey, the French gave her to us. Smiling is an American thing.
Dad: Listen to your mother, she knows a lot.
–Circle Line
Black guy: You would like him ’cause he looks like a gorilla, and they are from the Amazon like you.
White girl: Dummy, gorillas are from Africa; you of all people
should know that.
–Liberty between Greenwich & Washington
Suit #1: So what do they speak in India? Hindu?
Suit #2: Hindu’s not a language. It’s Hindi.
Suit #1: Right, right. So those people, they’re Buddhist?
Suit #2: Are you kidding me?
–51st & Park
McGuy: Hey, hey, watch your step!
Woman #1: …Hey, that guy just told you not to step in that.
Woman #2: Oops! Oh, but who pays attention to Mexicans in restaurants?
–McDonalds, Manhattan Mall
The man was white, wearing a punk leather jacket and a beret like Saddam Hussein, and had a goatie. He stands up and says: I like Eminem ’cause he can talk his way out of trouble in the black neighborhoods. You’ve heard of oreos, black on the outside, white on the inside? Well I’m a chocolate chip cookie, and I’ll take a toll on
your house!
Man: Uzis are made in Israel but in the hands of blacks on the street. Go figure. Why don’t they do a study about how that happens at NYU, aka NYJew!
Man: Wake the fuck up, America! France pronounces its words better than us, even in their rap music!
Man: Why don’t they play flutes at the orchestra? It’s just a bunch of bam bam bam…Might as well be at a AC/DC concert. ‘Cause they’re afraid it’s too gay! You know in Germany they call it the “queer-flute,”; I used to play flute and I ain’t no fuckin’ queer. Now I just keep my flute in a box, and I’m not making a dirty joke and no, I don’t play the skin flute!
–A train
Overheard by: Dave Smith
Girl: God there are so many Chinos here. I hate Chinese people.
Guy: You’re so dis…What do they call it? Racist! That’s not a very good attribute to have, Christina.
Girl: The only people I like are Spanish people and white people.
Guy: I hope one day someone who’s black and Chinese and…80 other races all mixed together bitchslaps you in the face!
–Canal & Lafayette
Overheard by: nadja spiegelman
