Toddler waiting for subway with mom: I need a snack.
Mother: You need a smack!
–Franklin Ave
Overheard by: Danielle
Toddler waiting for subway with mom: I need a snack.
Mother: You need a smack!
–Franklin Ave
Overheard by: Danielle
Mother: Here you go, honey. (hands clothing to daughter in dressing room)
Daughter: A 14? Mom, I'm a size 10! I know you think I'm morbidly obese, but…
–Bay Terrace, Queens
Overheard by: tinabee
Woman: Her parents are Republicans! They must be! I knew that I would eventually become a target of the Republican conspiracy.
Man: Why do you say that?
Woman: Don’t you see? They’re obviously trying to turn our son against us by taking him out of the country.
Man: If they’re Republicans, why would they be bringing him to France?
–Cobble Hill
Mother: Thas what you gotta watch out for: those assholes.
3-year-old daughter: Okay, Mommy.
–14th & 3rd
Overheard by: Sanandara Bong
Dad: You get back here! If you get hurt, I am not going to take you to the hospital. I will not be late. I will just stitch you up myself when we get home.
Daughter looks skeptical.
Dad: I learned how to do it in prison.
–129th & Lenox
Guy on phone: His dad’s, like, crazy, and he lives in a house all by himself, and the saddest thing is… the saddest thing is this guy’s dad is even uglier than our dad!
–Waverly Place b/w Mercer & Greene
Woman: Don’t even think about humping your father’s feet!
–President & Columbia
[Before the start of the NYC pillow fight.]Pillow-fighter: I’m gonna beat you all down like you were my daddy! [Hits people with his pillow.] Why weren’t you there, dad, why!?
–Union Square
Guy on cell: Hey dude, my flight has been delayed like an hour, yeah it does suck… [Pause.] Dude, from this point on I’m calling you "daddy". No: "big daddy". Yeah, hey big daddy…
–US Airways Terminal, Laguardia Airport
Little girl pointing at a grizzly bear: Daddy! Daddy!
–Museum of Natural History
Way too blonde girl: Do you want to stay at my house tonight?
Dude: Absolutely not.
Way too blonde girl: What if my parents aren't home?
–Restsurant, University Place & 11th St
Overheard by: CourtSnort
20-something woman: You’re going to worship my mother when you meet her.
Man: I will?
Woman: Yes. Because I do.
— Pizzeria, Boerum Hill
Tourist mom: The last thing I wanted was to be drunk in front of my children.
Son: Too late.
–Embassy Suites, near WTC
Overheard by: Shanaca
Six-year-old boy: The talent show is tomorrow.
Mother: Oh, are you doing anything?
Six-year-old boy: Yeah, 50 Cent.
Mother: Honey, that’s a little inappropriate.
Six-year-old boy: What does inappropriate mean?
–2 train
Overheard by: Ana Orellano
