Girl #1: And then there was the stabbing.
Guy: Whaaa?
Girl #1: She stabbed a cab driver.
Girl #2: Well, he started it!
–Cafe Mogador, St. Marks Place
Overheard by: Eric
Girl #1: And then there was the stabbing.
Guy: Whaaa?
Girl #1: She stabbed a cab driver.
Girl #2: Well, he started it!
–Cafe Mogador, St. Marks Place
Overheard by: Eric
Girlfriend: Will you love me forever and ever?
Boyfriend: Yes, even if you broke up with me and shot me and cut me into little bits and set the bits on fire.
Girlfriend: I would never break up with you.
–Central Park
Guy #1: I told you how he threatened me, didn’t I? He said he wanted to knife me and then sodomize me.
Guy #2: Man, your high school was fucked up.
–12th & B
Overheard by: Neckbeard
Drunk girl: Kool-Aid is my most favorite drink in the whole world. When she moved in, it was like great, because it was like, “You love Kool-Aid, too? Awesome, we’re going to get along great.” But then it ended up, she tried to kill me with a steak knife.
–11th St & 2nd Ave
Overheard by: Rick
Mom, to two young kids: …so she grabbed the scissors for self defense, and she stabbed him twice in the back.
–106th & Broadway
Overheard by: inge
Teen girl: Ooh, take a picture. Someone got stabbed here last night!
–Outside the W, Times Square
Overheard by: melissa
Asian tranny on cell: But we never smelt nothing cause we didn’t even know the body was there!
–51st & 9th
Little girl around 8 years old: I’m going to kill you.
Little girl #2: You can’t. You don’t have a knife.
Little girl #1: I didn’t mean violently. I meant humorously.
–56th & 6th
Overheard by: Nina
Woman: It’s a pity about that actress who stabbed someone with her knife. What’s her name? …Um…Reese?
Chick: Witherspoon?
Woman: No! With her knife!
–Central Park
Overheard by: Emilia
Suit #1: I know where we are.
Suit #2: Where?
Suit #1: On the corner!
–9th Street & 1st Avenue
Overheard by: Your Mom
Guy: Excuse me, can I tell you a joke?
Girl: …What?
Guy: Can I tell you a joke?
Girl: …No.
Guy: Are you su–
Girl: Didn’t you fucking hear me, you idiot?
She gets up and starts walking away.
Girl: Jesus Christ, these fucking…
–Central Park
