Straight Trippin’

Man: Hey! It’s so great to run into you! I haven’t heard from you in so long!
Woman: Yeah, that’s because you didn’t call me after we slept together.

–50th between 5th & 6th

Thug #1: So get this: I'm getting a haircut and this guy on a power wheelchair comes in, with a big ass fur coat and is like… “Who want da new Tupac CD?” I was rollin!
Thug #2: Only in Irvington, ma nigga.

–86th & Broadway

Overheard by: Adam Bixler

Girl #1, touching bamboo sculpture: Rose, how do you think they're gonna get this down?
Girl #2: I dunno, untie it?
Girl #1: But I mean… Are they gonna, like, move it to a warehouse or, like, incinerate it? That's super not ecologically sound.
Girl #2: Um…
Girl #1: Fuck! They should just put pandas up here. Like a shit-ton of pandas. One, pandas eat bamboo. B, it would get the job done fast and all that would be left is the rope. Three, the more pandas eat, the stronger they get; the stronger they get, the more they bone, and then they're less endangered. Four, it would be really cute on the news, and… Five? Dude, pandas!
Girl #2: Are you high?
Girl #1: I've just had a Riesen.

–Roof Garden, The Met

NYU girl #1: Yeah, I actually went through with it.
NYU girl #2: Oh god, did it hurt?
NYU girl #1: It was really nice feeling actually. The stuff was warm, but when it started taking effect it was like ear diarrhea.


Overheard by: interesting

20-something fashionista #1: If it weren't for Red Bull I don't know if I'd still be in college, girl.
20-something fashionista #2: Yeah, I know, girl… But if you take two, girl, it gives you diarrhea.
20-something fashionista #1: Yeah…

–L Train

Overheard by: ~LaLa~

Girl #1: When I was pregnant I was addicted to eating deodorant.
Girl #2: Damn, girl, that's just wrong!
Girl #1: It was so bad I couldn't even see my man in prison cause I couldn't go that long without some deodorant. Secret was good, but I didn't like that Dove shit. Sometimes I'd have to test that stuff out in the store. I'm all takin' a little lick, puttin' it back if I don't like it.
Girl #2: Shit girl, you're crazy.

–6 Train

Cute, somewhat cracked-out blonde: What kind of shot is this?
Bartender: It's my special shot.
Cute blonde: Um…does it go with Lorazepam and Adderall?
Bartender, trying not to laugh: Well yes, yes it does.

–Karavas Place, W 4th St

Black guy #1: Nigga, fuck you! I'm straight.
Black guy #2: Nigga…you're straight gay.

–Roosevelt Ave Station

Overheard by: just straight

20-something Long Island girl: Oh god! This breakup has been the best thing that has ever happened to me. I honestly don't even care that he dumped me.
Friend: Yeah, totally.
20-something Long Island girl: Seriously, he needs to realize if it wasn't for that sweater he was wearing, and the fact that I was on ecstasy that night, we would have never dated for this long.
Friend: Yeah! It was J.Crew… And they were double stacked…you were powerless.

–Lokal Bar, Greenpoint, Brooklyn

Overheard by: Aaron

Stoner guy: And then I realized that we are the reality of reality, get it?
Slightly less stoner looking girl: Wow. Okay. What else did you do your first day at work?

–St. Marks Place

Overheard by: Garuda