Asian NYU freshman: I still can't get over how many gay couples there are here! Especially when you see the black ones.
Naive friend: Really? That must be so weird.
Asian NYU freshman: Yeah, it is! I'm like, “Black people are supposed to be all ghetto, and cool!”
–Union Square
Overheard by: Really??
Woman: Well, I'm concerned about foreign policy.
Man: Of course, you can make anything into a foreign policy issue. The environment… foreign policy… What does that even mean?
–Sweet Melissa, Brooklyn
Subway voice: The next stop is Bleecker Street.
English tourist #1: Bleecker Street? What's next? Unhappiness Street? Miserable Street? Depression Street?
English tourist #2: Suicide Lane. That's what's next. Now there's a one-way street…
–Uptown 6 Train
Overheard by: Percival Under Cover
Tourist, loudly and proudly: They have this store at the mall!
–Louis Vuitton, 5th Ave
College girl: The second floor was pointless. It was, like, just furniture.
–Ikea, Brooklyn
Woman on cell: I'm not in a store! I know what a store looks like!
–Tompkins Square Park
Perturbed NYU chick, about New Orleans: Hopefully I will survive there for two years. They don't have H&M! Or Bloomingdale's or Anthropologie. They don't have Loehmann's…
–NYU Office
Overheard by: Melanie
Middle-aged guy passing clothing store with shirtless male models at front doors: Hollister? What is it, a ladies club inside?
–NoHo
Overheard by: Arielle
20-something Midwestern actress type transplant #1: Yeah, I was told by one of my drama teachers once, way back in school, that I had the “passion and commitment to theater” that Hitler had.
(five-second pause)
20-something Midwestern actress type transplant #2: Wow!
20-something Midwestern actress type transplant #1: No, it wasn't a compliment, she didn't like me very much.
–Chinese Restaurant, Astoria
Tourist: So what the difference between hummus and falafel?
Guy at counter: Well… one is hummus, and the other is falafel.
–Mamoun's Falafel, MacDougal St
Overheard by: Tacologic
Woman: Are there dogs in that roof?
Man, sarcastically: Yeah, roof dogs.
–Court St b/w Pacific & Dean
Dude in car: Hey! Hey! You lost something! Hey, you!
Bald man on cell: What?
Dude in car: Yea, you lost something! You lost your hair!
–94th St & Park Ave
Overheard by: Nadrian
Ghetto chick #1: When I was younger, I was afraid to wash myself in certain areas.
Ghetto chick #2: Why?
Ghetto chick #1: Well, I thought that if I washed my vagina, it would burn.
Ghetto chick #2: Um… You're over that now, right? You wash now?
Ghetto chick #1: Oh yeah. Everything's fine now. I wash it.
–Red Lobster, Times Square
Overheard by: Kit
Bearded male hipster on cell: My clit is so stimulated right now! (pause) The communists are attacking! (pause) This is awkward.
–Grassroots Bar
Overheard by: Sarah Booz
Guy playing guitar: Look on the bright side, at least we don't have to wait in line for toilet paper anymore. Fucking communists.
–L Train
Overheard by: Milt
Man, seeing another man carrying large box of cereal from warehouse store: That's the biggest box of Cheerios I've seen since we lived on the commune!
–6 Train
Overheard by: Janine
Young, normally-dressed guy, to no one in particular: Your President is a commie scumbag, and he owes me money.
–23rd St b/w 5th & 6th
