Girl: It was great — so smooth and quiet and roomy — there was tons of leg room!
Guy: Mhmmm…
Girl: Like, like, say these are my knees…
Guy: Those are your knees.
–Outside Penn Station
Girl: It was great — so smooth and quiet and roomy — there was tons of leg room!
Guy: Mhmmm…
Girl: Like, like, say these are my knees…
Guy: Those are your knees.
–Outside Penn Station
MTA employee: What train is this?
Subway rider: Uh… the W.
MTA employee: Does it go to City Hall?
Subway rider: Yes, it follows the same line as the R.
MTA employee: Oh, okay, good. [Upon reaching City Hall] Wow, that was fast.
–W train at Whitehall Station
Flight attendant on intercom: If you need any additional lighting, just reach up and press the grey button above your seat.
Passenger presses the ‘Call attendant’ button.
Flight attendant: That wasn’t the grey button.
–JFK
Hipster teen #1: Dude, where the hell is Madison Square Garden?
Hipster teen #2: Yo, I don’t know. My mom said it’s over here somewhere. It was right here last time I came!
Hipster teen #1: Dude, they don’t just move Madison Square Garden.
Hipster teen #2: Yeah, you never know, though. With all them terrorists and shit, they got to move stuff all the time.
–36th & Broadway
Overheard by: Corrie
Chick #1 overlooking the Women’s Wheelchair finals: Are they over there playing tennis in wheelchairs?
Chick #2: Yeah, I think they are.
Chick #1: Oh, please, you know they’re pushing those chairs with their feet.
–US Open, Queens
Overheard by: Working on my backhand
NYU chick: No, that can’t be true.
NYU dude: I’m dead serious — I couldn’t make that up!
NYU chick: So, you are honestly telling me that if you don’t wash your ball sack, you will grow cheese?
–10th St, between 5th Ave & University
Bimbette: I think Sandy* has dyslexia.
Friend: How do you know? You’re not in any of her classes.
Bimbette: I know, but she’s just so skinny.
–Madison Ave
Teen chick #1: So, like, how come you always hear about how they do tests and stuff to find out who babies’ dads are, but you never hear about dads checking who the mother is?
Teen chick #2: I guess the dads just never care that much.
–F train
Overheard by: please stop talking
Bimbette #1: So yeah, he decided to quit working at Cold Stone’s and go into the military.
Bimbette #2: Oh, okay, what part?
Bimbette #1: The military.
Bimbette #2: Yeah, which part? The Army?
Bimbette #1: No, not the Army — the military.
Bimbette #2: No, I mean the Army? The Navy? Something? The military isn’t a separate part.
Bimbette #1: No, it was just a general thing. Not a separate part. Just the military.
Bimbette #2: [Pauses] Oooh, okay!
–Borough Hall Station, 4 & 5 platform
Overheard by: Trish
Teacher: When did slavery end?
Student: Didn’t it end in like, 1970, when Martin Luther King freed all the blacks?
–Berkeley Carroll School, Park Slope
