Australian tourist to hobo on bench: Oh, shit, where am I?
Hobo on bench: Welcome to hell, lady.
Australian tourist to hobo: No, mate, I just flew in from there yesterday.
–Central Park
Australian tourist to hobo on bench: Oh, shit, where am I?
Hobo on bench: Welcome to hell, lady.
Australian tourist to hobo: No, mate, I just flew in from there yesterday.
–Central Park
French tourist girlfriend, arguing with boyfriend: Do you think I'm not being serious?I can't take it anymore!
French tourist boyfriend, with constant little smile: Tu trouverais pas cela plus stylé d'aller au bord de l'eau? (“Don't you think it would be much nicer to go on the waterfront?”)
(girlfriend leaves)
–Wall Street
Overheard by: Tom
American tourist: Where you're from?
European tourist: Berlin.
American tourist: Ah, Berlin–that's sooo lovely!
European tourist: You been there?
American tourist: Well, almost… We've been to, like… Barcelona?
–E 42nd St
Foreign tourist to security guard: Excuse me, where is Central Park?
St. Patrick's security guard: Central Park? Ooooh, that's like up at 110th Street. You're real far…
–St. Patrick's Cathedral
Tourist to another, looking at Ellis Island: Look, there is Alcatraz!
–Staten Island Ferry
Little tourist girl to dad: Why are there so many brown people in this city?
–Lexington & 59th St
Tourist: We have made it to the center of the earth!
–Times Square
Overheard by: Lance Torres
Tourist: Wow! Times Square is really busy tonight.
–Times Square
Overheard by: erkala
Teenage tourist: Soooo… It's like a little bus… On rails… That goes in a tunnel?
–42nd & 7th
Female tourist: Hey, we're in New York City! We can let our hair down and have fun!
Male tourist: Too bad I'm bald.
Female tourist: Well, you're screwed.
–Starbucks
Tourist son wearing Red Sox jersey: There doesn't seem to be many places to eat around here, I'm hungry.
Tourist mom, also wearing Red Sox jersey: I'm sure we'll find a pizza place somewhere, we'll just have to walk a bit.
–44th St & Lexington
Overheard by: only two delis and four starbucks down the street…
Douche tourist #1: Yeah, so, I've been hanging out in Bed-Stuy a lot. You know, where Biggie Smalls grew up? It's the real hood. I'm having so much fun. You can get, like, Chinese food, and the guy's just like “okay, man, okay” if you don't have a gun.
Douche tourist #2: Yeah. It makes you think, how we live in, like, this little bubble.
Douche tourist #1: Totally. But I used to have a fake ID for teenage rebellion. But Minneapolis is such a 21-and-over town. They took the ID away from me. (sighs) That was such a great ID.
Douche tourist #2: Do you know Sam? She plays hockey.
Douche tourist #1: Real hockey, or…
Douche tourist #2: No, girl hockey.
Douche tourist #1: You mean field hockey. I love field hockey. I'm serious, I want to play field hockey so bad. I think it's reverse sexism that they don't let guys play.
Douche tourist #2: Well, guys can play. You'd just have to play against each other, not the girls.
Douche tourist #1: Why?
Douche tourist #2: Well, guys are stronger than girls.
Douche tourist #1: But what if we wore the same skirts? Than we'd be too embarrassed to play good.
–Coffee Shop, 8th St
Local-seeming girl: So this is Chelsea.
Touristy guy: Hmmmm, smells really good!
(girl gives him dirty look)
–24th & 8th Ave
Tourist #1: I didn't see any strawberry bushes.
Tourist #2: Yeah, I don't think I did either.
Tourist #1: False advertising again!
–Strawberry Fields
