Tourist: What’s a gable?
Tour guide: A peak in a roof.
Tourist: So, a gable is a roof?
Tour guide: Uh… Yes.

House of Seven Gables
Salem, Massachusetts

Middle-aged American tourist woman: The rooms here have strange plugs, I simply cannot use my curling iron! This is outrageous… I want to see the manager immediately!

Hotel Restaurant

Overheard by: Dru

American tourist, overlooking Grand Canal: It's like… It's just like Las Vegas!


Overheard by: Pumpkin and Peanut

Tourist woman to wheelchair-bound local: Can you point me in the right direction?
Wheelchair-bound local: Yep, it's straight down that way.
Tourist woman: Okay…but is it walkable?

St. Lawrence Market

Overheard by: kingdubby

Passenger to Muslim agent lady: People must get freaked out when they see you.

Ticket counter, Newark airport
Newark, New Jersey

Overheard by: OOC

Artsy tourist to touristy-looking woman: More cats, more money!

Outside Museum of Turkish and Islamic Art

Lost woman: Excuse me, can you tell me what state I’m in?

Mall of America
Bloomington, Minnesota

Overheard by: ugh…tourists

Tourist chick, looking at rescuer on poster: Wow, if I knew I'd be rescued b a guy as hot as that, I would just jump.

Grand Canyon West Rim

Overheard by: Long way down

Middle aged tourist with shopping bags moving towards a small puppy: Well, my oh my, aren't you the sweetest looking thing in the world!
Puppy: (barks)
Middle aged tourist: Oh, go fuck yourself!


Overheard by: Adair

Hotel concierge: So, how did you enjoy The Big Easy?
Tourist lady: Oh, New Orleans is a wonderful city. I just wish I knew what it smelled like…
Drunk guy: “Ass.” That's the word your looking for. The city smells like ass.

Bourbon Street
New Orleans, Louisiana