White tourist: I’m really sorry — I don’t have any change. If I did, I’d give you some, but I don’t, so… sorry. Good luck with everything…
Black dude: Cracka, I’m ain’t homeless!

Hynes Convention Center subway stop
Boston, Massachusetts

Effeminate tourist guy on cell: So yeah, it was rigidly pressed in the watershed…

Cottage Street
Bar Harbor, Maine

Canadian tourist #1: Guys, you know what the States have that most of Canada doesn’t?
Three others: What?
Canadian tourist #1: Black people…

Buffalo, New York

Overheard by: Bored At Work

MTA worker to tourist mom buying tickets with daughter: 10 dollars.
Mom: Oh, but she's a student.
Worker, looking at daughter: Oh! How nice for you! (looks back at mom) Ten dollars please.

Subway Station
New York City, New York

Overheard by: Glad thats not my cheap-ass mom

Tourist to waitress: How do we get to the bad part of town?

Overheard by: kyle

Tourist #1: No, there is more than one kind of virginity.
Tourist #2: What?
Tourist #1: You know, like anal-ginity, Argentina-ginity, Ameri-ginity. All kinds of ‘-ginities.’
Tourist #2: Wow, that’s sick, man.

Buenos Aires

Middle aged Midwest tourist, extremely wistfully: I wish I would've gotten her that marionette…

Wall Drug
Wall, South Dakota

Overheard by: Melissa

American tourist #1: What's your background?
Tourist guide: Aboriginal.
American tourist #1: No, as in “where were you born?”
Tourist guide: Here, in Australia.
American tourist #1: But you're black!
Tourist guide: Yes… I'm aboriginal.
American tourist #1: But I thought you guys were all extinct! Are you, like, the last one?
American tourist #2: Jay, shut up. It's idiots like you that make us look stupid. He's messing with you, there are no aboriginals.

Adelaide, Australia

Australian tourist: God, it's so hot in here. I can't wait to get out of here and take these pants off.
Church security guard, overhearing: Yes… that is very difficult to do in a church.

Vatican City

Overheard by: LeBron

Obese middle-aged tourist to husband: I called him and told him we're at passenger pick-up 2. He called and asked where we'd be, and I said passenger pick-up 2, that's where he can find us. It's just easier to find us when he gets here. Passenger pick-up 2. And it's cold. That's why I brought this vest. I brought this vest in case it got cold, and it got cold. I'm going to button it up. Did you hear me? I'm going to button it up. There, it's buttoned. (husband ignores her)

Newark Airport, New Jersey

Overheard by: EthanK