Piano Player: This song from 1980 by Christopher Cross is my favorite song in the whole world.
–Piano Bar, UES
Piano Player: This song from 1980 by Christopher Cross is my favorite song in the whole world.
–Piano Bar, UES
Little Girl: Mommy, why do people in New York always wear black?
Mommy: I don’t know. Maybe they just don’t like looking pretty.
–Upper East Side
Where: E. 86th St.
Mother to kindergartener: “You do too know who Derek Jeter is! He da one with da nice butt–BOOM!!”
Woman: Having sex with him was the same as eating a slice of plain Wonder bread while looking in the window of a Crate and Barrel.
–York & 70th
Into an unplugged phone, a hobo yells: Honey, honey, I told you not to call me in the office!
–LES
Hipster chick: Ugh, dolls. Dolls are so creepy. I’m never letting my kid have a doll. Drugs, yes. Dolls, no.
–UES
Dude #1: I’m gonna stand up as I turn. I’d like you to kick me in the nuts. The idea is to black out, end up in the hospital, and push this off on someone else. Ready?
Dude #2: I was born ready.
–59th & Park
Woman #1: I’m ready for ugly, if it keeps me warm in bed.
Woman #2: I don’t know about that.
–UES
Overheard by: Todd Seavey
Guy to friends: She walks like she has a huge dick, that's how she walks!
–Office Building, 34th St & 3rd Ave
Overheard by: Spacedog ears
Drunk guy: So I put my dick in the hard drive.
–10th St & Ave A
Overheard by: guy walking dow street friday
Girl on cell: I can't compete with his dick!
–L Train
Overheard by: fuhggedaboudit
Angry hot girl to friend: Even if he's the biggest swinging dick in the world, so what?
–10th St & 5th Ave
Overheard by: jennifer tobias
Angry middle-aged woman to silent husband: I come home, I want some gin and some dick.
–59th St & Lexington Ave
Overheard by: Dave
Girl #1: I can't believe I'm looking at apartments on Lexington Avenue… It's not like I'm going to be, like, an equity analyst at UBS.
Girl #2: Or, like, Bain.
Girl #1: Yeah.
Girl #2: I don't even know what those words mean.
Girl #1: What, “equity analyst”?
Girl #2: Well, “equity.”
Girl #1: Equity is just money.
Girl #2: Oh, well, I know what that is.
–59th St & Lexington
Overheard by: Chris
