Old white woman: Are you Japanese?
Young Asian Guy: I’m American.
Old white woman: But is your family Japanese?
Young Asian guy: I’m American.
Old white woman: But are you of Japanese descent?
Young Asian guy: I’m American.
Old white woman: Like from 1776?
Young Asian guy: Yes.
–32nd & 6th
Overheard by: Paul D
Indian guy: Hey, what country are you from?
Asian girl: Tibet.
Indian guy: So you live in Tokyo?
–F Train
South Bronx gangster #1: Yo, damn, look at that Asian girl, son!
South Bronx gangster #2: You ever been with an Asian girl?
Gangster #1: Nah, son, you?
Gangster #2: Nah, yo, but I heard them pussies is sideways!
Gangster #1: What?! Sideways?!
Gangster #2: Yeah, son, sideways. They pussies is siiiideways!
Gangster #1: Shit, I gotta try and get with one now.
–the Bronx
Overheard by: Scullface
Loud, nerdy guy: They’re basically a bunch of shitty MySpace kids with mutant powers. Like the hedgehog kid: his power is that spikes come out of his body, what the fuck is that? I could roll around in glue and syringes and get that guy’s power.
–Prospect Park
Overheard by: Zoh
Middle-Aged man: I think vampires are kind of stupid. They seem to care an awful lot about how they look and what others think. It’s like, who cares? You’re six hundred years old and on your way to hell, hello?
–5th Ave
Overheard by: Someone who thinks he has a point
Asian girl: One of my cousins is a dragon.
–32nd St
Overheard by: sneakyintern
Asian valley chick: So, I bought this shirt? And it was like…it was like…it was like, a shirt? And it was really cool.
–N train
Man: Wow, you speak good English. Where are you from?
Asian girl: Australia.
Man: Do they speak English there?
–1 train station
Asian guy: Yo, nigger.
Black guy: Fuck you. You ain’t my nigger.
–90th St, Elmhurst
Asian girl: Where do you want to go to college?
Greek girl: Huh, You have pink eye? My brother had that. It’s mad contagious.
–Bronx High School of Science
Incredibly Jappy woman #1: I’m looking forward to using these bath melts I made.
Incredibly Jappy woman #2: Bath melts?
Incredibly Jappy woman #1: Yeah, I call them bath melts because “bath bombs” really doesn’t seem PC.
–JCC, 76th & Amsterdam
Overheard by: Kimberly Ballinger
Teen girl: Ooh, take a picture. Someone got stabbed here last night!
–Outside the W, Times Square
Overheard by: melissa
Asian tranny on cell: But we never smelt nothing cause we didn’t even know the body was there!
–51st & 9th
