Small child in stroller: Mommy, why did you wake me up? Don’t wake me up when I’m sleeping!
Mom: Fine. I’ll leave you on the train and you can miss your stop and then the rats will get you.
–Brooklyn bound Q train
Overheard by: djingo
Small child in stroller: Mommy, why did you wake me up? Don’t wake me up when I’m sleeping!
Mom: Fine. I’ll leave you on the train and you can miss your stop and then the rats will get you.
–Brooklyn bound Q train
Overheard by: djingo
Queer: Fuck you! I’m a smart gay!
–23rd & 6th
Overheard by: Keesha Brown
Accidental ironist: Yeah, obviously he has no sense of smartness.
–68th & Lex
Overheard by: Casti
Hipster guy: I erased two years of my life with drugs. Two solid years! But I’m too smart to erase more than that.
–Chinatown bus
Girl on cell: They said that I’m smart, and that I can articulate well. But I’m not… you know… Oh, whatever.
–Queensboro Community College
Overheard by: LizDayglow
Tween boy to dad: I’m looking for a girl who’s younger and smarter.
–71st & West End
Overheard by: Susan Volchok
Little boy: Ewww…ewww….
Mom: Stop saying ewww..those are bras..
Little boy: I hate bras
Mom: Don’t say that, you’ll change your mind when you gets older.
–JC Penney lingerie department, Queens
Overheard by: a fellow shopper
Soccer coach: You have to kick from your shoelaces.
Girl #1: I don’t have any laces!
Girl #2 with mismatched shoes: Do you like my shoes?
–P.S. 158, 77th & York
Overheard by: Jen
Little boy: How come every time you come around, my London, London Bridge…
Father: I told you, I don’t like that song. Stop singing it.
Little boy: …wanna go down, like London, London, London…
Father: If you don’t stop singing it, I’ll kill you.
Little boy: …wanna go down, like London, London, London…
Father: That’s it, I killed you. You’re dead. No one can see you now.
Little boy: I can’t be dead. I have to pee.
–Uptown 2 train
Overheard by: Ashwini
Pregnant woman: I’m going to have a little girl, just like you.
Little girl: Oh! How nice for you. You must be very happy.
–Starbucks, 102nd & Broadway
Overheard by: Todd
Thug in cuffs: Yo, da ba-dunk-a-dunk is constimatutionally protected!
Undercover cop: Yes, but this is child pornography.
–Houston & West
Overheard by: Nick Dempsey
Mom: Zacky! Where your ass at?
Small boy: Nowhere.
Mom: Yeah it is!
–Times Square
Mom: Why don’t you go and help your uncle fix the car?
Young girl: Excuse me… I’m not a screwdriver and I’m not a mechanic.
–Astoria
Little boy: That’s not art!
Mom: Shhh… some people think so.
Little boy: Nope, not art.
–Whitney Museum, 5th floor
Overheard by: didn’t think it was art either
