Teen girl #1: What’s the body of water we’re crossing?
Teen girl #2: I think it’s the Long Island Sound.
–X1 bus, Verrazano Bridge
Teen girl #1: What’s the body of water we’re crossing?
Teen girl #2: I think it’s the Long Island Sound.
–X1 bus, Verrazano Bridge
Girl: Excuse me, can you tell me how to get to Little Italy?
Man: You’re standing in it.
Girl: But isn’t this still Chinatown?
Man: Yeah, it’s that too.
–Mulberry & Grand
Overheard by: The Fever
A white girl listening to her iPod snaps to attention, horrified, as the conducter announces the stop at 135th Street.
White girl: Oh my God! Where am I?
–2 train
Overheard by: emilie
Fat chick: I said excuse me!
Fatter chick: Ya, well, you were up my ass for the last 5 minutes.
Fat chick: Ya I want to be up that fat ass!
Fatter chick: Shall I follow you to Queens? Shall I? Some of us can afford to live on 60th Street.
–59th Street station
Guy: It’s so crazy, you know, leaving Manhattan.
Girl: I know, if you would have told me five years ago that I’d be living in Brooklyn I’d have laughed at you.
–L train
Overheard by: Benjamin
Guy: I’m doing a house in the Hamptons, but I only know one person, this one girl. So I get an e-mail to meet everyone for drinks on Thursday, and I look at the names and it’s girl girl girl, girl girl, Santos, girl girl girl…and I’m like, “OK, am I the only guy in this house?”. And she said there’s a couple other guys coming out for 1 or 2 weekends. So I’m like, “OK, all girls, that’s cool. Are they cute?” and she says, “Yeah, they’re all cute.” So I said, “Well, I’m not matching the first couple weeks, they’ll think I’m gay!” She said, “Yeah don’t match, they’ll think you’re gay.” So I’m not matching. Plus they’re going to see “Santos” and think I’m freakin’…card-carrying…freakin’…off the boat, just swam the…freakin’ Florida canal…from Cuba or something.
–V train
Overheard by: kt
Guy #1: It’s really great that we have Central Park, you know? It makes the city so great in the summer.
Guy #2: Yeah, I know. It’s great to be this close to nature.
Girl: Also, the trees must make a lot of oxygen for the city.
Guy #1: That is true.
Guy #2: I bet some of it also comes from Jersey.
–Central Park
Overheard by: Lora
Tween girl: …when her water broke, she rode her bike to the hospital. How ghetto is that?
–B44 bus
Lady: They better give me my money back or I’m gonna get 7 on my side!
–K-mart, Staten Island
Overheard by: tony
Store guy on cell: Nah, man I can’t go out tonight! I’m broke! I just paid for an abortion.
–Pathmark, Cherry Street
Overheard by: Jubie D.
Suit: I need to go uptown, where they know the difference between a hot dog and a frankfurter.
–The Water Club, E. 23rd Street
Overheard by: Dave
Beach guy: I’ve seen what happens to people that go in that water. They become mutants.
Beach girl: Our lives can only be improved by becoming mutants.
–Jacob Riis Park
Tourist guy: We’re staying down on Two Avenue. Now do they say Two Avenue or Second Avenue here?
–Columbus Circle
Overheard by: Chess
Tourist woman: We’re in Manhattan, right?
–Times Square
Tourist girl: Can’t we like, just call a cab? You know, like, “Hi, we need a cab, pick us up here?”
–42nd between Broadway & 6th
Overheard by: Heather Hunter
Tourist guy: Do they just breed dogs smaller here, or what?
–Broadway & Astor
Overheard by: jillypickle
