Teacher: Little known fact — you can still get crabs even if you wear a condom. Those suckers just jump from one person to the next, and then you have to go to the doctor and say, ‘Yes, I’m a dirty human being.’
–Bronx Science
Woman with wine glass on cell: Your sister is about to fuck my ex-husband and FYI — he has herpes.
–Outside the Hudson Hotel
Yuppie to chick: You look like you have herpes, but I’d sleep with you anyways.
–51st & 9th
Overheard by: A. Bystander
Chick on cell: Dude, like when Princeton claimed everything was confidential from our parents, but I got a copy of a bill they sent them that said, clearly, ‘Chlamydia and gonorrhea test…’
–113th & Broadway
Overheard by: McF.
Chick to friends: That’s a story for when you’re fucking and you say, ‘Hey, you only get AIDS once…’
–10th & Ave B
