Guy #1: She stuck her lollipop in my mouth! And she has herpes!
Guy #2: She has herpes?
Girl: Well, everyone has herpes…
–Sin Sin, E. 5th Street
Overheard by: Jon Zebraskey
Guy #1: She stuck her lollipop in my mouth! And she has herpes!
Guy #2: She has herpes?
Girl: Well, everyone has herpes…
–Sin Sin, E. 5th Street
Overheard by: Jon Zebraskey
Middle-aged guy on cell: How does an eighty seven year old woman get gonorrhea?
–Washington Square Park
Overheard by: sean sullivan
Brunette (looking at her crotch): Helllllllooooooo!?
Blonde: Are you talking to your vagina?
Brunette: No, my chlamydia.
Blonde: I think you’re talking to your vagina.
–Blockheads, 50th & 9th
Overheard by: Shirley
Girl: Yeah, so, did you hear that the bald eagle isn’t extinct anymore?
–Central Park
Old junkie guy #1: …So the bitch is fucking bitching about wearin’ a condom. She won’t let me bust my nut in her ’til I slap one on. So I do! And the bitch gives me crabs!
Old junkie guy #2: What a ho.
–Bx15 bus
Coworker #1: It looks like one of your clients is testing positive for gonorrhea or chlamydia.
Coworker #2: Kinky.
–Broadway & Canal
Overheard by: office peon loves her new job
Guy: You guys know what herpes are?
Teen boys: Uh…
Guy: Herpes are what you get from whorehouses. They look like…you know pretzel sticks with salt?
–Brooklyn-bound D train
Maxim staff #1: Yeah, we’re going to make you walk around in a plastic bubble or something.
Maxim staff #2: …NO, that is not THE RIGHT KIND of herpes!
Maxim staff #3: Is there a RIGHT kind of herpes?
–Midtown elevator
Childish woman, after burping: I have burpies!
Older, grossed out woman: You said it, not me!
Childish woman: What?
Older, grossed out woman: You just told everyone you have herpes!
Childish woman: I don't have herpes! I have burpies!
–Q Train
Overheard by: Audrey
Girl #1: I keep getting urinary tract infections.
Girl #2: Well, maybe he has a dirty penis.
Girl #1: No, I wash it for him in the shower.
–Penn Station
Overheard by: Susan
