Dude, Summer School Was Never Cool

Student taking exam: Mr. F, sir, I really don’t understand this.
Mr. F: See your ass in summer school, nigga!
Student taking exam: I’m sorry, what?
Mr. F: So, that’s not cool anymore?

–High school

Posted on February 4, 2015
Education, Insults, Questions, School, School and studying, Students, Stupidity, Talking/Convos, Teachers/Professors

So Much Poor Hygiene in Such a Small Space

Freshman girl to friend: It smells like ass in here.
Junior girl with purple hair: I think it smells like stinky vagina!

–Queens College Campus

Overheard by: Lindsay

Posted on February 3, 2015
Ass, Compare/Contrast, Default, Friends, Girls, Health and Hygiene, Queens, Queens College, Scents of the City, Sensory Experiences, Students, Vagina

Ronald Looks Pretty White, Though– Just Sayin'

Foreign 7th-grade boy: Where do you live?
Local 7th-grade boy: Harlem, have you ever heard of Harlem?
Foreign boy: No.
Local boy: Do you know McDonald's?
Foreign boy: Yes.
Local boy: That's where Harlem is.

–3 Train

Posted on February 2, 2015
Foreigners, NYC Geography, On the Subway, Questions, Students, Stupidity

The Tank Was Pretty Much Empty at That Point

Girl, after writing essay: You know how she asked us to write what we thought?
Boy: Yeah.
Girl: I put down that I needed to blow my nose.

–NYU

Posted on February 1, 2015
Boys, Default, Education, Excretions, Girls, NYU, Offers and requests, Questions, Students

Isn't That Why the Lollipop Guild Was Formed?

Teacher: Which race of people were counted as 3/5 of a person during the 1850s in the South?
Student: Midgets.

–Williamsburg High School

Posted on January 31, 2015
Fast Times at New York High, History & Geography, Questions, Race, Students, Stupidity, Teachers/Professors, Williamsburg

It'll Be a Brilliant Follow-up to Your Last Term Paper, “Why George Washington's a Big Poopyhead”

NYU girl #1: So what are you going to call your essay?
NYU girl #2: “Why Ansel Adams sucks.” By Tina*.
NYU girl #1: That sounds about right.

–Washington Square Park

Overheard by: Bruce Lee

Posted on January 29, 2015
Books & Writing, Insults, Parks, Students, Visual Art, Washington Square Park

We’re Very Motivated Get to the Next Grade

Student: That man is giving away free juice. Can we have juice?
Teacher: No. Then you’ll have to pee during the show, and I’m not disrupting the whole theater to take you to the bathroom.
Student: You’re the meanest teacher ever!
Teacher: I’m training to be a mommy. How am I doing?

–Minskoff Theatre

Posted on January 28, 2015
Parents, Students, Teachers/Professors, Theater

The Race Is to the Swift, the Slice Is to the Strong

Pizza lady: Next.
[No one responds.]Pizza lady in loud, harsh voice: Next!
Loud, black girl at the beginning of the line: Okay!
Random NYU student: Wow, the pizza line is rough today.

–NYU Kimmel Center