Collegiate #1: I can't believe that asshole MTA called the cops on us.
Collegiate #2: Seriously, isn't it enough that we risked our lives crossing the subway tracks to get to the other side? Fuck that guy, we wasted $2.00 and then had to take a cab to escape the police.
–Columbia University
Sophomore #1: You are *not* allowed to pass out in the gutters!
Sophomore #2, deadpan: I didn't pass out. I laid down.
–Cooper Square & Astor Place
Loud student, looking at intricate homework assignment on projector: Who has the time to do that, seriously?!
Skater dude #1, muttering: Shit, I have the time to do that, I just spend it getting fucked up.
Skater dude #2: Shit man, we all do!
–School of Visual Arts
Overheard by: art school has bros too
Girl on cell: You told me that bitch was dead, but I just saw her in Key Food.
–Williamsburg
Middle school girl: No, he wasn't dead, but you'll never guess what happened.
–Penn Station
Man on phone: No! No! Do you hear me!? Listen! It's time to die!
–33rd & Broadway
Overheard by: J Harmony
Man on cell: I went back into the room 30 minutes later and he was still breathing! What are we going to do?
–8th & 34th
Overheard by: Bret B
Adorable three-year-old girl to mother: When I die you can have all of my shiny stuff!
–Uptown A Train
Overheard by: The Green Cat
30-something blonde in office attire on cell: You need to tell Vanessa that she can't be on the show because she's not overweight enough, and s not unattractive enough.
–Whole Foods Market, Chelsea
Syracuse University girl, going up escalator: I feel like I'm in Star Trek! (begins humming Indiana Jones theme)
–Penn Station
Overheard by: Mickey
20-something gaysian: Yeah, he watches Hannah Montana so I don't get why he makes fun of me for watching iCarly!
–Washington Square Park
Teen: I watched I Love Lucy last night. She's funny; she's like the Jim Carrey of the 1920s or something.
–UA School of Music and Art
20-something preppy kid to mother: You know, they really should have a reality show about Midtown.
–54th St b/w 1st & 2nd Ave
Overheard by: Pedro
NYU girl #1: You're smoking again. You're a smoker.
NYU girl #2: No I'm not! I only smoke when I'm stressed out in New York.
NYU girl #1: (blank stare)
NYU girl #2, realizing: Shit.
–Washington Square Park
Overheard by: …shit.
Catholic schoolgirl #1: I think I'm going to have sex with my boyfriend tonight.
Catholic schoolgirl #2: Well, you know… you can't use a condom.
Catholic schoolgirl #1: Really?
Catholic schoolgirl #2: Yeah… they taught us that in school, hello?!
–Starbucks, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Jessa
Professor: So… basically you're asking me pointers on how to not be a… racist?
Student: Um… No?
–New School University
High school guy #1: Dude, you look so hot today!
High school guy #2: Seriously, dude?
High school guy #1: Yeah, man. If we were gay, I'd so do you!
High school guy #2: I thought the same thing about you.
–Chelsea
Overheard by: Robert
Girl to group of students: The hard disk is like the motherboard of the computer.
Boy in group: Oh!
–NYU Kimmel Center
