Gigantic suit, urinating outside: Excuse me, ladies. I apologize for that.
Ladies: It’s OK.
Gigantic suit: There’s a big black cock on the loose.
–19th & Broadway
Overheard by: becca
Gigantic suit, urinating outside: Excuse me, ladies. I apologize for that.
Ladies: It’s OK.
Gigantic suit: There’s a big black cock on the loose.
–19th & Broadway
Overheard by: becca
Chinese guy: Hey, now that you’re here we can go to Sylvia’s in Harlem and get some soul food.
Black guy: What do you mean, "now that I’m here"? What, you can’t go to Harlem by yourself, but now that you’ve got your token black you’re safe? That’s fucked up.
Chinese guy: Let me ask you something: would you go to Harlem alone at night?
Black guy: OK, that’s not the point.
–Chinatown
Overheard by: Ricky
Ghetto chick: They got some shit out there called Purple Motherfucker.
Ghetto guy: Yeah, I know about that. I don’t like to talk about that shit, though.
Ghetto chick: That shit so good, make me wanna curse my momma an’ shit!
–A train, between 125th & 145th
Overheard by: Deckard
Black guy #1: Man, we shoulda gone to the Target in Queens!
Black guy #2: Yeah! That’s where all the white people go!
–Target, Inwood
Overheard by: amused white girl
Police cruiser stops on 8th Ave by a group of black teens.
Loudspeaker: What are you doing there?
Black teens: [inaudible]Loudspeaker: OK, but no hands.
One teen takes three long strides and leaps on top of a mailbox, wobbles precariously, touches one finger on a wobble, and stands straight up.
Loudspeaker: Used your hands.
–34th & 8th
Black man: Quit turning around and walk, bitch. I ain’t gonna rape you.
White woman turns around and walks a little faster.
Black man: You ain’t even my type! Too skinny! I like ’em big!
–Madison Ave
Black woman: Excuse me, miss?
Upper-East-Side white biotech: I don’t have any money.
Black woman: I just wanted directions.
–74th & Lex
Black woman: You’re my lawyer! Ain’t it your fucking job to take care of shit like this?! All you white people, controlling everything–you’re all incompetent! Fuckin’ white people!
White attorney: Sandra*, please calm down.
Black woman: Fuckin’ white people!
White attorney: Ma’am, speaking as a white person who happens to hold $379,000 of your money in escrow, may I suggest you stop cursing at us and calm down before I get up and take your checks with me?
Black woman: I will not calm down!!
White attorney gets up and leaves the room.
Woman’s husband: See what you did? You done upset the white man. I ain’t got no problem wit you cursin’ at crackahs, but why you gotta go and piss off the white man who got all our money?
–54th between 7th & 8th
Overheard by: Amused white intern
Black guy #1, noticing white guy walking down the street: Aw, man!
Black guy #2: There goes the neighborhood.
White guy: This is the cheapest rent in the city. You better believe my people are going to start moving here.
–Franklin Ave, Brooklyn
A bunch of Asian people get on the train.
Black teen boy #1: Whoa, shit! Half of China up in here!
Black teen boy #2: No shit, man. We better represent!
Black teen girl: I’ma get out my phone, be like, “Where my nigga Shaneequa at?”
–3 train, 116th St/Lenox Ave
Overheard by: quiubomona
