Tourist: Excuse me, does the F train stop here?
Employee: Are you kidding me?
–Subway restaurant, Houston & Lafayette
Tourist: Excuse me, does the F train stop here?
Employee: Are you kidding me?
–Subway restaurant, Houston & Lafayette
Frat guy, to bodega employee: Do you guys have Vitamin Water?
Hobo: I got your Vitamin Water right here. It’s called B-E-E-R!
–DeKalb Ave, Brooklyn
Psychic lady: Can I read your palms?
Man: Fuck no! Can I read yours?!
–Mulberry St
Overheard by: Joe
Girl: Last night we went to a party in New Jersey.
Guy: On purpose?
–Cherry Tree Bar, 4th Ave, Brooklyn
Overheard by: ashley friedman
Fat guy, caught illegally parked to buy and gobble a hot dog: It’s a New York Tradition.
Cop: Move your car, or that’s going to be a hundred and fifty dollar hot dog.
–Grey’s Papaya, 8th Ave
Woman: I’m glad it’s starting soon. I could use some laugh therapy.
Friend: Um, it’s not really a funny play…
Woman: Yeah — I was kidding.
Friend: Oh.
–Waiting to see King Lear, The Public Theater
Overheard by: could use it, too
Little boy, excitedly: Can we go to Chelsea Piers again?!
Mom: No. That would require having money.
–11th & Ave B
Daughter: Oh, Mom! Look, there goes all those comic books kids are reading.
Mother: That’s a cult. Hurry up the escalator.
–Comic book section, Borders, 33rd & 7th
Customer: What kind of muffins do you have?
Waitress with thick accent: Um… Normal muffins? You know… Brown.
–Diner, Upper West Side
