Black guy, yelling out of his car at cute girl crossing the street: Hey! You look like yo' white boyfriend call you fat, but mama, that alllllll good!
Cute girl: I have never felt so offended and so complimented at once. (deadpan) This must be love.
–Grand Army Plaza
Overheard by: aenigma
Rushed New Yorker shoving through tour group: Excuse me, excuse me…
Tour guide: Don't worry, folks, most New Yorkers aren't this rude.
Rushed New Yorker: Screw you! Yes we are, that's what everybody loves about us.
–Bryant Park
Overheard by: I agree
Tourist: I read about this place in that New York book I got from the library.
Guy in line: Did it also tell you that when it's a full moon everything is half off?
Tourist to friend: Dude! We should just both get the large, then.
Friend: I love this town and its little quirks like this.
–Gray's Papaya
Ditzy chick: I'm not telling him that I love him because I don't want to set myself up for disappointment.
Flamboyant boy: Sometimes you have to take risks, or else you will never get “appointed”. (laughs)
Ditzy chick: Ha ha ha. “Appointed” isn't even a word.
–57th & Park Ave
Overheard by: Titiful
Freshman girl #1: Oh my god! Bread! My bread!
Freshman girl #2: Wait…what…? Oh, yeah! Bread! I love you, bread!
Freshman girl #1: Oh, bread. You're my bread.
–114th St & Broadway
Overheard by: pomy
Chick #1: Man, I wish Colin would stop saying he loves me.
Chick #2: Why, you don’t love him?
Chick #1: I care about him, but I don’t love him. I only love one person.
Chick #2: Who? God?
Chick #1: No — me.
–Park Plaza Diner, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Haley
Queer: So, yeah, I told him I cheated on him.
Fag hag: Oh… So you don’t really love him, then.
Queer: You think so?
Fag hag: Oh, darling. When you really love someone…
Queer: I know, I know, you don’t cheat on them.
Fag hag: No! When you really love someone, you cheat and never tell.
Queer: You’re so ahead of me.
–Mercer & Broome St
Nine-year-old boy stocking vegetables: Mommy, why did they make child labor laws?
Mother, hugging son: I don’t know, honey. Maybe because you’re suuuch a sweetie.
–Food Co-Op, Park Slope
Overheard by: such a thing as too much praise
Bible thumper: I love you all… even you, sir.
Man: I hate you.
–A Train
Overheard by: SanjayU
Busker with jackhammer vibrato: Some say looooooooove it is a huuuuuuuuuuuuunger…
Suit: I'm going to chew off my cortex.
–1 Train
Overheard by: Rose Fox
