British boy: I thought you weren’t smoking anymore.
British girl: I only smoke when I’m in New York City.
–Outside the Wellington
British boy: I thought you weren’t smoking anymore.
British girl: I only smoke when I’m in New York City.
–Outside the Wellington
Dude #1: That restaurant across the street must be amazing. There’s always a crowd outside. Is it really that good?
Dude #2: No. It’s a bus stop.
–65th & Central Park West
Big black lady #1: Have you been to that new Queens mall?
Big black lady #2: No.
Big black lady #1: Half the people be shoppin’, half of ’em be watchin’ people, and I don’t even know ’bout the other half. It gets so damn crowded!
–1 train
Overheard by: No Kidding
NYU bimbette #1: What were the original seven wonders of the world?
NYU bimbette #2: I don’t know — some shit that I’ve never heard of. Hold on, I’ll look it up… The Hanging Gardens of Babylon. Where the fuck is that?
NYU bimbette #1: I don’t know… Long Island?
–NYU BOBST Library
Girl: I never get into empty cars anymore. Last time I did there was a dead guy laying there, and I was stuck with that smell in my nose all day.
–Subway platform, South Ferry
Overheard by: annikee
Man to wife: What, you want to keep riding the train back and forth? I did that shit once. It was the most boring experience of my entire life!
–Grand Central
Overheard by: soixantedeux
Chick after V train passes through the station: There’s a runaway V train and people are still on it!
–C/E platform, 23rd St
Girl: Whenever I’m on the subway all I can think about is sex!
–NYU
Overheard by: ana
Announcer: There is a Bronx-bound one train approaching 34th Street.
–14th St station
Overheard by: Glad to know where the train I missed is
Mom to small child: Do you know if the trains are running express today, or will we have to take the local all the way down?
–W 93rd St
Tourist girl: Waaait… Is this the bus?
–E train, Queens
Overheard by: MegMC
Man: Well, at least if you get deported you’d get to go somewhere exotic. If I get deported I go back to the Bronx…
–Barnard College
Conductor, as rap music blares through speakers: Yo, this is a shout-out to all my niggas keepin’ it real on the 1 train. Takin’ the 1 to the Bronx at four a.m. — that’s gangsta, son!
–Bronx -bound 1 train
Female employee: I’m so annoyed… so annoyed. This morning there was a dead body near the Bronx train station. It made me late for work. The train was sooo crowded. I hate that! I hate when we are all packed in the train like sardines!
–Fox News Channel newsroom
Chick: He’s either retarded… or from the Bronx.
–Hell’s Kitchen
Overheard by: mokee
Trendy girl: Yeah, well, it’s cheaper to steal cars in the US than to import them.
Fellow employee: Yeah, so he steals these cars and takes them way the hell out to the middle of nowhere… Like, Brooklyn…
–Office elevator, Park Ave South
Overheard by: way too much time on my hands
Yuppie lady #1: I just love jogging around the reservoir in Central Park at dawn.
Yuppie lady #2: Yeah, it’s great… The only people out at that time are fitness fanatics and crackheads.
–Elevator, Time Warner Center
Drunk lady: Excuse me, does this train go to Grand Central?
Guy departing train: Yeah.
–6 platform, Grand Central
Overheard by: maybe i should have said something…
Student: What’s the closest subway station that will get us to the Bronx?
Hotel worker: Are you sure that’s where you wanna get?
–Radisson Hotel
