Little boy: Hurry up, hurry up, mommy! We don’t want to be late for the party!
Mom: Honey, there is no party to be late for.
–71st & Broadway
Overheard by: Natasha
Little boy: Hurry up, hurry up, mommy! We don’t want to be late for the party!
Mom: Honey, there is no party to be late for.
–71st & Broadway
Overheard by: Natasha
Woman: So, has your little friend Jamie text messaged you recently?
Man: No, actually she hasn’t.
Woman: That’s right, because I called that fucking bitch up and told her to find her own man.
Man: Are you kidding me?
Woman: No. And by the way, your mom made me do it.
–Candela, East 17th Street
Woman #1: Yeah, so I dropped my baggage off at my mother’s house the other day.
Woman #2: Are you going on a trip somewhere?
Woman #1: No, I just needed her to babysit for a while.
Woman #2: Babysit what? I don’t get it.
Woman #1: The children, dammit! The children!
Woman #2: Relax! At first you said baggage…Oh, I see now.
–Macy’s, Queens Center Mall
Mom: Damn! His report card is good!
Dad: You sound hyped for that shit!
Mom: I am hyped for that shit!
–Bed-Stuy
Girl on cell: Can you hear me when I roll my eyes?
–82nd & York
Little boy: Dad, why did his legs pop up like that?
Dad: Rigor mortis, son. Rigor mortis.
–New York State Theater, Lincoln Center
Man: When I told her I worked for the State of New York she seemed to
lose interest.
–F train
Little boy: What’s the “n word,” Dad?
Dad: I’m not gonna tell you.
Little boy: Why?
Mom: It’s worse than all the other words because it makes specific people feel bad.
Dad: You don’t need to know it. It’s one of those things you’ll learn when you get older. You’ll learn a lot of bad things when you get older.
–Barnes and Noble, Astor Place
Overheard by: Ben
You’ll learn all this and more, at 7PM on Wednesday night at the store above. Please come join us as we discuss and sign our new book.
Mom: So why didn’t you come to dinner?
Dad: I don’t like you.
–44th & 9th
Overheard by: puppy
Guy: Dad, you had to see this broad; she must have been 200 to 250.
Dad: Like you’re some prize. You are 40, divorced, have 3 kids and live at home with your parents.
–68th & York
Overheard by: Anthony DiGangi
