Suit #1: So what do they speak in India? Hindu?
Suit #2: Hindu’s not a language. It’s Hindi.
Suit #1: Right, right. So those people, they’re Buddhist?
Suit #2: Are you kidding me?
–51st & Park
Suit #1: So what do they speak in India? Hindu?
Suit #2: Hindu’s not a language. It’s Hindi.
Suit #1: Right, right. So those people, they’re Buddhist?
Suit #2: Are you kidding me?
–51st & Park
Law chick #1: I assume you passed the corporate accounting exam?
Law guy: Yeah, somehow. I couldn’t get the balance sheet to add up so I just added $130,000 in cash to assets to make it balance. It was a total Hail Mary but it worked…Wait, can you do a Hail Mary at a Jewish law school?
Law chick #2: Sure you can. There’s less interference.
–Cardozo School of Law, 12th & 5th
Old lady #1: Even when they say “happy holidays” to me, I say “merry Christmas” back.
Old lady #2: Good for you.
–34th & 7th
Overheard by: Kenneth Grider
Woman: So when is Christmas this year?
Man: Um. I think it’s on Sunday this year.
Woman: No, I mean what date is it?
–Clinton Hill
Overheard by: Megan Winget
Guy #1: So did you get to see him this weekend?
Guy #2: Yeah, but we were clothed.
–6 train
Indian guy: Yo, I never told you I almost became a monk.
White guy: Shut up. You serious?
Indian guy: For real. I was this close. Before I applied for colleges, I checked out what you had to do to become a monk.
White guy: I couldn’t picture you as a monk. You don’t even go to church.
Indian guy: I know, right? I found out that they don’t allow piercings so I never applied.
–6 train
Overheard by: Yasmin Henning
Guy #1: She’s really religious, she even goes to a Jesuit school.
Girl #1: Oh! Like JTS?
Girl #2: What?
Girl #1: What? Isn’t Jesuit another word for Jewish? Like Orthodox or something?
Guy #1: Um, no.
–Columbia University
Hobo: You people are all evil…You are oppressors…You’re gonna be up shit’s creek when Moshiach comes!
–37th & Broadway
Overheard by: Alexander
Teen boy #1: So I gotta go home, change, and then meet her and go to church.
Teen boy #2: Who the hell goes to church on a Friday night? How often do you go to church?
Teen boy #1: Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays…sometimes Sundays.
Teen boy #2: Damn dude, when are you gonna have time to lose your virginity, dude?
Teen boy #1: That’s what I’m working on, man!
–F train
Overheard by: Geisa
Girl on cell: Listen, listen. What I’m saying is, why can’t we just try to find a way to keep all of the Jews and the non-Jews from like, marrying? Or even interacting?
–Washington Square Park
Mom: Stop giving your sister the evil eye! What did I tell you about giving people the evil eye?
Little boy: That they would be sent to Hell forever to live with the devil.
–Bx22 bus
Bookchick #1: I had to go and see a circumcision yesterday. Any mother who does that to their son is evil and should burn in Hell.
Bookchick #2: Yeah, but it’s much more hygienic.
Bookchick #1: So? Your labia gets dirty too.
–Barnes & Noble, 22nd & 6th
Overheard by: Vic Payback
