Gym chick #1: I ran a whole half-hour today.
Gym chick #2: A whole half-hour?
Gym chick #1: Yeah, you know why? ‘Cause Star Wars was on and it was so good I couldn’t stop watching.
–YMCA, Park Slope
Overheard by: Jedi Master
Gym chick #1: I ran a whole half-hour today.
Gym chick #2: A whole half-hour?
Gym chick #1: Yeah, you know why? ‘Cause Star Wars was on and it was so good I couldn’t stop watching.
–YMCA, Park Slope
Overheard by: Jedi Master
Dude #1: So, why did you break up with her?
Dude #2: Because she got herpes.
Dude #1: What?! You gave it to her!
Dude #2: Yeah, I know, but it’s different — herpes is gross with girls. It’s like a battle wound for guys, though.
–Slipper Room
Old man picks loose string off back of woman’s coat: You’ve got something there… Ah, now you’re perfect!
Woman: Oh, well, thank you!
Old man: You believe that and you’ll believe anything.
–Stromboli’s Pizza, St. Mark’s & 1st Ave
Overheard by: shankalicious
Headline by: greg
Runners-Up:
· “Like Creationism…” – Drew
· “Now hold still while I examine you for breast cancer” – Zorak
· “On an unrelated note, my penis cures cancer” – Wes Mantooth
· “Puppetmaster IV: The Rude Awakening” – Chris
· “That’s What God Said To Adam & Eve, Too” – fritzy
Hipster #1: Shit, I forgot the wine.
Hipster #2: You’re such an idiot. Where is it?
Hipster #1: I don’t know, in some store somewhere. But it’s okay, because I have a joint.
Hipster #2: You can’t bring a joint if she invited us for dinner. It’s not a ‘thank you’ if you’re just gonna smoke it.
–Brooklyn-bound F train
Overheard by: Yiriam Madison
Asian princess: #1: You know what’s annoying?
Asian princess: #2: What?
Asian princess: #1: When, like, people carry, like, two bags.
Asian princess: #2: Oh my god, I know! Like, when they have their school bag and then their coach bag…
Asian princess: #1: Totally! It’s like, sooo annoying.
Asian princess: #2: Yeah! That’s why I put my bag in my school bag.
–Q11 bus
Teen girl #1: I just wish there was some middle ground. Like, if they could take the baby out without killing it.
Teen girl #2: Yeah, I know what you’re talking about.
Teen girl #1: But with rape, I think it’s totally wrong. It’s her fault.
Teen girl #2: Really? Why?
Teen girl #1: If you’re walking down a dark alley all alone, you have it coming to you. You should know better. It’s totally your own fault.
–42nd & 6th
Overheard by: Chris Cardinal
Yuppie lady #1: I just love jogging around the reservoir in Central Park at dawn.
Yuppie lady #2: Yeah, it’s great… The only people out at that time are fitness fanatics and crackheads.
–Elevator, Time Warner Center
Guy #1: He hates women.
Guy #2: So he’s a misogynist?
Guy #1: No, he’s a choreographer.
–57th & Broadway
Guy #1: So she told me that she wants to make out more.
Guy #2: Huh?
Guy #1: She wants to sit and make out but not have sex.
Guy #2: Why bother making out if it isn’t going to end in sex?
Guy #1: That’s what I said.
–15th & Colfax
Overheard by: sean b
Comedy club promoter: Hey, ladies! Next show starting in a few minutes — drink specials…
Girl: We’re not in the mood to laugh.
Comedy club promoter: We’re not that funny!
–W 3rd St, between 6th Ave & MacDougall
