Chick #1: …So, like, now he ain’t got no toes!
Chick #2: He should be in National Geographic.
–86th & Lexington
Overheard by: Reaper
Chick #1: …So, like, now he ain’t got no toes!
Chick #2: He should be in National Geographic.
–86th & Lexington
Overheard by: Reaper
Queer #1: I woke up this morning with a used condom hanging from my ass. Was that you?
Queer #2: You are so disgusting.
–Cilantro’s, 89th & 2nd
Overheard by: Srednivashtar
Businessman lady: I’ll have a light latte please, with brown sugar. You do have brown sugar, don’t you?
Countergirl: Um, no.
Businessman lady: Well, then give me your finest, finest grade sugar, all right?
Countergirl: Oh. Sure.
–Dunkin’ Donuts, 93rd & 1st
Overheard by: Gina Loiacono
Guy: The only reason she was hanging out with those dudes is because she was hoping that one of them would kill me…But that’s neither here nor there.
–6 train
Dude: Shit man, slow down. Slow down. Whatcha runnin’ to?Yoga? Nigga’s runnin’ to yoga. White man runnin’ to yoga. Thought yoga was supposed to cure that shit.
–Union Square
Girl #1: How does she afford to live here?
Girl #2: You think she is selling her cooch?
Girl #1: No. I should sell mine, though.
Girl #2: That’s like trying to sell the AM New York.
–89th & 2nd
Girl on cell: Can you hear me when I roll my eyes?
–82nd & York
Woman: So the Olympics are in Italy?
Man: Yeah, Torino.
Woman: Where’s that?
Man: Italy.
–Bryant Park
Old woman: Did you hear what I said? Did you hear me?
Old man: I heard you, woman. But I can’t hear you now!
–116th & Lenox
Cashier girl: You have more than 10 items.
White man: Who are you? Are you the items police?
Cashier girl: You’re only allowed to have 10 items.
White man: Fine, but I have two of the same items, so does that count as one item or two?
Cashier girl: I have to call the manager.
–D’Agostino, 76th & Lexington
Overheard by: Andrew Saint John Goodwin
