Father: And that’s where Mommy is.
Little boy: That’s where the penis is!
–Prospect Park
Overheard by: E.B. Dresner
Teen girl #1: Yeah, I ran away once, ’cause like, my parents were making me study for a science test.
Teen girl #2: Oh my god, you so don’t have any problems. My parents are making me get a job!
Teen boy: Not having money to buy food is a problem. Not having an apartment is a problem.
–F train
Young teen boy: She obviously must wear push-up bras, cause sometimes it's big and sometimes it's smaller!
Young teen girl: I wore push-up bras in like, 5th grade. But once you start wearing them you can't stop, cause then everyone will know! But I don't need them anymore, I caught up.
–F Train
Overheard by: TheKatiedidntwearpushupsin5thgrade…
Headline by: Fresca
Runners-Up:
· “But I’m Still Wearing Pull-Ups Panties” – JohnnyB
· “No Boobies Left Behind Is Working Splendidly for American Youth” – rachel
· “Overheard at Dolly Parton Junior High School” – Vasyl
· “Somewhere There’s a Salvation Army Stocked with Wonderbras…” – RaRa
· “What You Call “Catching Up” Everyone Else Calls “Augmentation Surgery”” – If I can touch em.
Dad: Did you bring your book?
Teen boy: Yeah.
Dad: Oh good; that way we don’t have to talk.
–Tekserve, West 23rd Street
Overheard by: Bethany Murphy
A little Asian boy sneezes without covering his mouth.
Black lady: Excuse you!
Asian mom: He’s only 3, he didn’t know any better.
Black lady: Haven’t you heard of bird flu, motherfucka!
–M96 bus
Overheard by: Chris Roberts
Girl #1: I feel like shit. I think I’ve got the Asian Bird Flu.
Girl #2: Don’t you mean Avian Bird Flu?
Girl #1: Whatever.
–56th & Broadway
Overheard by: K.M
Woman: Isn’t it here in America?
Teen boy: Naw…it’s in Japan. All these people be dying from it. Thank god Bush won’t let it in the country.
–Associated Supermarket, Astoria
Overheard by: Demy
Little boy: Hey mommy, I just farted on your leg.
Mom: I know. I felt it.
Little boy: Was it warm? Did it stink?
Mom: Shh.
–F train
Little girl: What I don’t get is why Majestic stabbed Fifty. He already shot him like 9 times.
Little boy: Majestic didn’t stab Fifty! He got his boy to stab Fifty for him, and he did it because Fifty was still alive.
Little girl: I couldn’t survive 9 shots. I could barely survive a half.
–1 train
Teen boy: I did the stupidest thing yesterday.
Teen girl: What?
Teen boy: I went up to the cops with my bag open, and I was like,
“Wanna search me? Wanna search me?” and they were like, “Okay.”
Teen girl: Ha, ha. You busted.
Teen boy: Yeah. They took half my condoms but they left everything
else.
–40th Street station
