Dad: Did you bring your book?
Teen boy: Yeah.
Dad: Oh good; that way we don’t have to talk.
–Tekserve, West 23rd Street
Overheard by: Bethany Murphy
Dad: Did you bring your book?
Teen boy: Yeah.
Dad: Oh good; that way we don’t have to talk.
–Tekserve, West 23rd Street
Overheard by: Bethany Murphy
A little Asian boy sneezes without covering his mouth.
Black lady: Excuse you!
Asian mom: He’s only 3, he didn’t know any better.
Black lady: Haven’t you heard of bird flu, motherfucka!
–M96 bus
Overheard by: Chris Roberts
Girl #1: I feel like shit. I think I’ve got the Asian Bird Flu.
Girl #2: Don’t you mean Avian Bird Flu?
Girl #1: Whatever.
–56th & Broadway
Overheard by: K.M
Woman: Isn’t it here in America?
Teen boy: Naw…it’s in Japan. All these people be dying from it. Thank god Bush won’t let it in the country.
–Associated Supermarket, Astoria
Overheard by: Demy
Little boy: Hey mommy, I just farted on your leg.
Mom: I know. I felt it.
Little boy: Was it warm? Did it stink?
Mom: Shh.
–F train
Little girl: What I don’t get is why Majestic stabbed Fifty. He already shot him like 9 times.
Little boy: Majestic didn’t stab Fifty! He got his boy to stab Fifty for him, and he did it because Fifty was still alive.
Little girl: I couldn’t survive 9 shots. I could barely survive a half.
–1 train
Teen boy: I did the stupidest thing yesterday.
Teen girl: What?
Teen boy: I went up to the cops with my bag open, and I was like,
“Wanna search me? Wanna search me?” and they were like, “Okay.”
Teen girl: Ha, ha. You busted.
Teen boy: Yeah. They took half my condoms but they left everything
else.
–40th Street station
Guy #1: Tell em’ what I did.
Guy #2: Pissed on her.
Guy #1: I pissed on her face while she was sleeping!
–Coney Island Boardwalk
Overheard by: Kate C.
A mom points to the window of a sex shop, at a jacked mannequin wearing a mask and feather boa. She says: Hey honey, maybe that’s what you could be for Halloween.
Little boy: No, Mommy. I want to be a fireman.
–Christopher Street
Overheard by: Jon
Two teens are watching Jeopardy! through a store glass window.
Teen boy #1: I can read lips; that guy said he liked to suck cock.
Teen boy #2: You mean, “What is, ‘I like to suck cock’?”
–14th & B
Overheard by: meghan
